I don't even know where to start.

[awakemysoull]

Dp is a twat.

It's taken me a long time to wake up to this but a few months ago when he left me in labour to go to the pub, I wised up.

He is emotionally abusive and very very selfish.

The past week has been awful. Putting me down at every given opportunity and he has just spent the past 11 days and nights in the pub.

I have tried several times over the past few months to get him to leave but he laughs at me and refuses to move out saying he has nowhere to go.

I genuinely have nowhere to go.

I'm skint because I'm on maternity leave and I have 2 dds to provide for because he doesn't see why his hard earned wages should be spent on anything other than himself. I pay rent and bills and everything else and I'm in debt up to my eyeballs because I rob peter to pay Paul every month whilst he lives the high life going out every night and buying new clothes and gadgets.

I have put up with it for far too long and I'm a total mug. I have no self esteem and my confidence is nil but I have to get a grip for the sake of my dds.

I recently found out I was pregnant and he went mental. It was not planned at all it was an accident we just weren't careful enough and stupidly I thought I'd be alright seeing as we had sex about 4 times in the past few months.

I have decided to have a termination because it's just not do able. I couldn't afford another and I couldn't cope with a 11 month age gap. This is something that's upsetting me and he has been awful about it telling me I'm pathetic for being so upset about it.

He does absolutely nothing with dds and lies in his bed all the time he is in the house on his phone doing fuck knows what.

How can I get him out my house? The tenancy is in both our names but everything else is in my name. I pay everything.

I have been to a solicitor to try and get an exclusion order so he has to leave but they said I didn't have a case and the judge wouldn't grant it so It wasn't worth me losing all that money.

I'm dreading him home from the pub tonight because of the row we had earlier about me not doing the washing up. I do everything chores wise he doesn't lift a finger but dd2 has been upset all day she's teething and I haven't had a chance to do them. I've done everything else though I am trying. He has never ever done housework and to be honest he doesn't know how to. It's so hard to keep the house immaculate with 2 children and doing it all on my own. I am shattered.

I honestly feel like giving up and just running away but I know I can't.

I'm not a troll.

Any advice?

Is it HA housing?

Maybe women's aid could advise you? Sounds like it's financially abusive so they could help

It's a private let.

I have been looking at other private let's in the area but the chances of me getting a deposit and first months rent together are nil.

I have a couple of things I can sell but nowhere near the £1200+ I'd need to move home. The council here aren't very helpful but I'm going to give them a call on Monday to see if I could get temp accommodation. They don't class me as homeless because on paper I have a home etc. Is this something woman's aid could help me with?

Yes I think Womens Aid is a good place to start. Someone to advocate for you with the council would be good.

Once you're single you will recieve more tax credits and other help. You'll save money on food. You'll not have to wash his clothes, tidy up his things etc etc. everything will be much easier. Hold on to that...your life is about to get much much better.

When is the lease up on your place now? Can you not go to the landlord and Explain the situation? Do you think there's any chance they could release u early and you move elsewhere?

You need proper advice tho. Solicitors and/or CAB. Just hold on the fact that you're on your way to a happier you....you deserve it.

By the way...you're not a mug. You are strong to put up with this got so long. You're strong to make these exit plans. You can do this xx