Text from distraught DW.

[akaWisey]

I had a text this morning from some poor DW who's DH joined the dating site I'm on and I went on a date with him a few weeks ago. She has discovered he's cheating on her and obviously has text all the women he's been seeing.

I'm mortified for her. I had absolutely no idea he was married. He said he was divorced. I went on one date and didn't want to see him again so declined a second date and forgot about him. This woman was distraught. They have DC's and a long marriage.

As I've been on an number of dates I didn't know who he was so I asked her his name and then I remembered him. I've told her that, honestly, I've not been intimate with him at all. She's divorcing him.

i have her number still. I imagine all sorts are going on for her and I feel the right thing to do is leave it, even though when she texted back she was shaking and crying and loves him still. But I hate to think of what she's going through. Anyone who recognises me will know why I came to MN in the first place, but I feel sick that I unknowingly have contributed to yet another fuckwit's destructive behaviour.

Oh rubbish :(

You should probably stay well away and suggest she gets some RL support and wish her well.

But me being me, I'd probably make friends with her x

"I unknowingly have contributed to yet another fuckwit's destructive behaviour."

You haven't contributed to his behaviour.

He would be on dating sites looking for women to shag even if you didn't have access to the Internet.

He used you and the other women he's lying to and trying to shag because he doesn't really think any of you are proper humans deserving of respect.

Feel sorry for his wife and forget about it.

The nicest thing you can probably do for her is direct her to the MN Relationships board.

Hassled that's what I thought about doing.

Nothing to do with you how her husband is behaving, you won't be the first or the last I suspect, it's becoming quite common nowadays, sad I know.

Poor love :(

He's the arse. Not you and certainly not her. What a shit situation.

You definitely haven't contributed to this misery. You've been lied to same as his DW and there's only one person responsible for his actions. I think you've told her all you usefully can and probably best to drop the correspondence. Your twat-detectors must have been working well that night.... lucky escape.

I feel so sorry for her (and you!), what a sorry excuse for a man.

You did nothing wrong, you weren't to know.

You know what the MN response will be, wisey

Not you, him. You haven't contributed to anything. If it wasn't you he was trying to get off with, it would be someone else (not that you are disposable or interchangeable in any way ...)

That poor woman.

There but for the grace of God ...

That poor woman.

You've done nothing wrong.

I've deleted her number and the texts. If she contacts me again and asks I'll answer all her questions.

That fucking bastard. His family's life will never be the same again.

Have you googled him Wisey?

This is what I'd do nowadays before dating someone off the internet.

You did nothing wrong, but apart from feeling terrible sympathy for that poor woman, I'd be furious at wasting an evening on this twunt.

She phoned me this morning.

I told her everything there was to tell which wasn't much given how much else she's uncovered. She sounded so nice and completely bewildered. .

But I did the MN thing and told her not to fall for the denials, minimising, blame-game or faux tears. I don't think she will somehow.

It's awful , I've had a wife ring me up for a guy I'd not even met just swapped numbers .
It was many moons ago and I did feel sorry for her but at the end of the day he's to blame not us as he's the liar !!