Sex dating sites - what would you do?

[arghhhagain]

Here it is in brief -

• Snooped on fiancé's phone whilst pregnant, drunken messages to girl from work telling her how pretty she is and how he wished he'd stayed there with everyone who went out.
• Suddenly has a pin on his phone
• Finally figured it out (Yay) and checked messages and found nothing.
• Part of me still feeling suspicious so checked his internet history...

Porn, porn, porn and more porn. This im not toooo bothered by. But he has also joined 5/6 sex dating sites. He has done this by creating a secret email address. His other one I made for him for his xbox because he's not amazing on computers.

As far as I can see he's not a full member on any of them so he can't send or receive messages so I don't get why he's on them?! Just to check real people out? He's joined in the last week by his emails.

I feel so hurt it's untrue but I don't know what to do. I cant mention it or he'll know I snooped

P.S When we first got together I kissed someone else, completely took responsibility for it. Found out he'd joined some site and he said it was as revenge and he's sorry. Has he been on them all along you think?

you don't like anyone else putting uncomfortable pictures in your head, do you, cron

stop doing it on vulnerable women's threads then

it makes you look like a creep

Cron, I'm sorry you have such a poor opinion of men.

Me, I have a poor opinion of OP's husband. I imagine she was hoping for a grown-up to father her children.

Er, read the posts CRON, it's a little more than occasionally. There's a scary bloody number of women dealing with this shit daily. And not necessarily when they are pregnant. There's always a bloody excuse - and 9 times out of 10 these men blame the woman. They never take responsibility.

Grow some bloody balls and grow up with it. Pregnancy might affect both in the couple but it seems it's nearly always the man that looks elsewhere to deal with it. A real man would talk to his partner about it. Not bloody window shop or go elsewhere to have their ego flattered.

AnyF is right. Off you trot!

Albert27 - A real man would talk to his partner about it. Not bloody window shop or go elsewhere to have their ego flattered.

Having been there, I totally agree

As someone who kicked her husband out a few weeks ago for the same thing. Get out! or pack his bag. I was heartbroken but with support here and very good friends I am managing to get out the other side.

I was with him 11 years and I forgave and forgave but this time enough was enough. I was in a sexual health clinic for 4 hours having all the tests. All negative thank goodness

Please dont be me. Im 41 with 4 kids and yes its a struggle but I am finally getting my self esteem back. I look in the mirror and see me again and not some crazy super sleuth who was watching her back all the time.

My thread is here somewhere and I should update. I have applied for a divorce and getting back on track x

An update would be lovely, dh. And well done x

You need to talk to him right away, maybe he has cheated, maybe he hasn't but you know he has propositioned a girl at work and showed nothing but contempt and disrespect to you.

The 5 or 6 dating sites are excessive too. He sounds like a serial player, sorry.

Kissing someone when you first met doesn't really match up.

There's something seriously wrong here and if I was you I'd be going mad at him, not worrying he'll know I snooped, you snooped for a reason, there's no trust or respect in your relationship.

I'll tell you what I did OP.

I printed out his profile and joining emails and I went round to his place (we had been together for 6 years but didn't live together). I asked him what the fucking hell this was all about. (There was more stuff too but I won't bore you with the sordid details).

He denied it. I laughed in his face. Called him every name I could think of under the sun and invented a few nore then I walked out of the door and have never laid eyes on him since.

That is what his bahaviour deserved and that is what he got

Woah!!! Well done you Boop!!! xx

I adored that man. Worshipped the ground he walked on. It nearly broke me to walk away. But I did it.

And you can too OP. You have to talk to him about it or it will eat you up inside

I was the OP of this thread! I don't even remember posting this I just found PMs relating to it when sending someone else a PM.

Long story short I stayed, whilst pregnant with our second child he cheated, resulting in me sitting in a clinic 7 months pregnant. Stupidly stayed in my pregnant haze and found messages when baby was 4 weeks old and he'd been sleeping with a girl from work for months.

I'm now super happy like 3 years on just me and the kids and it is heeeeeaven

He may change, he may not. Shame to have a child growing up in broken home, but also a shame to have 2 unhappy parents together.

No what would be a shame would be to have stayed with this cheating prick!
Well done OP you deserve so much more than that and so do your kids!!!

I'm happy for you Heat, I'm glad you've had a happy ending (although so sorry about all your hardship with the ex).

Thank you!!

Also Nadia I take no shame in being a "broken home" hate that term, we aren't broken.

Yeah no broken home OP, just a happy home well done

What a great update. Well done for rebuilding and bettering your life OP must have been so hard but so worth it as you and your kids are happy!