Beginning it think I will never be asked out ( with girly friends)

[DOOFUS1]

Sorry, feel I have to get this off my chest. I feel like I am the only person not being asked out for drinks or play dates.

I am quite quiet but I do chat at toddler groups ( where possible with two little boys in tow). I know about 15 ladies through groups and have a bit of a chat but really need proper conversation without kids. I ask some old friends to come out for drinks and they mostly make their excuses.
I feel I don't know the ladies at groups well enough to ask out on an evening and to be honest I am about to give up asking. I never get asked and was in a group of ladies at a party today and they changed tack and started to discuss where they were meeting tomorrow night. No asking if I wanted to join them.

So am I doing something wrong? I have tried really hard to be social, but realised tonight that I have been trying for 4 years now and got nowhere.
I work 3 days a week which limits me a bit on the social side now, but sick of toddler groups, maybe they are just cliquey or I am destined for a life of loneliness.

Feeling fed up, sorry girls!

Do you ask questions? Perhaps if you had chimed in with a question about where the meet up was happening you might have got an invitation.
I do sympathise as toddler groups can be really annoying.

I find it hard to make the jump between seeing people at toddler groups and being on friendly terms there to arranging to see them outside that setting. I've so far only managed this once and it came about because I was uncomfortably (for me) forward and asked her for her facebook details so we could keep in touch. Then I invited her to my son's first birthday party, she couldn't make it but arranged a trip to the park together the next week.

I have now accepted that it is very unlikely that people are excluding me on purpose when they seem a bit clique-y. They just don't know I'm a bit desperate for adult company and tend to talk to their friends. So I feel that its my job to be forward when there is something I'd like to do, they can always say no. I always think other people are sorted friend-wise, but maybe they are just waiting for me to invite them!

In your case, they probably aren't being delibrately mean, just a bit oblivious.

If you don't feel you know them well enough to invite them round (or out) for an evening - and there is always the danger that they don't really like leaving the kids for an evening out anyway depending on their ages, childcare and the family's other commitments - how about doing something intermediate like a playdate/lunch/park/softplay thing, or if one of the groups is in town, you could make an open offer of "I was thinking of going for some coffee and cake (etc) at [good local cafe] straight after this, would (any of) you like to join me?". Hopefully the friendly ones who could also use the company will take up your offer.