Unsure of my judgement, is this odd behavior?

[WawaSkittletits]

I've never really dated before but for the past few months I have decided to give it a go. I've been in some bad relationsips in the past and I think I can finally recognise certain red flags for abusive and controlling behavior early on.

The situation Im in now is a bit strange though as I've met a man that is coming accross a bit too nice. I dont know if my past is affecting my judgment and this is generally how a nice man behaves but to me its a little odd.

I met him online after finding out we had alot in common but weve not met up yet. Heres the thing.

• He wants to be in constant contact, he will message me constantly and although I like to leave an hour or 2 inbetween (as otherwise it would literally be back and forth messages every few minutes) he will message me asking if Im ok if I've not go back to him.

-He says I mean alot to him even though weve not met and when I had to cancel our first date due to me being ill he was apparently beside himself with worry.

• He is incredibly insecure and if were on the phone and he hears my skype go off in the background he will need reasuring that hes not taking up my precious time. He constantly tell me he doesnt understand why I would be interested in him.

• He talks about future trips together and when I mentioned I needed a holiday after a particularly hard week with my daughter he offered to pay for me to go on holiday, just me and her.

This is too much isnt it? I've not led him on, I've told him I'm not looking to rush into anyting and I cant make much of a decision on whether to see him again till after weve met up. Im so used to looking out for the 'bad guys' that things like this confuse me.

'Im not ready for a relationship'
And you get the response he gives because this means - I'm not ready right now but I might be soon. Which gives him hope if he hangs in there he will be the one you want the relationship with.
Be very clear.
This isn't working me and then cut all contact.
Block his emails and texts etc..... and just leave it to fizzle out.

You've definitely dodged a wrong 'un there OP.

hrmm .. "I think that you are a very nice guy but at the moment I would rather leave it where it stands between us, if I'd been readier for a relationship.

I hope you find happiness. All the best"

and if he still doesnt take the hint

" it would be better not to stay in contact"

and then don't respond to anything further at all

Might that help?

Ooooh I felt queasy just reading that OP! Second what everyone else has said, if it's this full on already imagine what it'll be like if you do meet up?! I bet he's one of those who says thank you after sex as well you'd never hear the end of him!

Overbearing dressed up as affection, over-familiar, doesn't take no for an answer and then accuses you of being harsh? He's wearing that red-flag like a moo-moo isn't he? :) I think you're going to have to spell it out for him that it's over and then cut contact. This one has stalker potential I fear.

I have to echo what queenie said, you don't (yet) have the ability to recognise red flags- or if you do, you've been ignoring them for too long.

This guy is odd. Remember, You don't have to give anyone 'a chance'. Why should you?

Don't let him talk you round.

Just send him a link to the blogpost and the video...

eeeeew

trim him, ridiculous behaviour, desperate and needy

yikes

Where is the video??