Am I being too sensitive?

[mitsey]

Dh was playing with ds4 and dd 3 in the lounge with an old suitcase.I was upstairs and overheard him say get in a playful way to ds get in the suitcase i will let you out again.I rushed downstairs and was fuming saying"don't tell him to do that he might get stuck inside,are you right in the head"
Then dh said in a nasty way "your the one not right in the head,you have no idea about children,none at all"
That second remark really upset me,to be told by your children's father that I have no idea about my own children is devastating and makes me doubt myself and think is that what he really thinks of me as their mother.

He was probably just having fun with them and would'nt have put ds in the case but I worry is has put the idea into ds's head and he will try and shut dd in.

Am I too over protective and need to lighten up a bit.

Well, i dont think he did/said anything that you didnt.

I believe that the one who is clueless about children is totally depending on the sort of luggage you keep at your home:

-One with a samsonite type lock (I would have killed DH!!!)

-One with a zipper, I would have totally ignore it (maybe because I don't have a Samsonite, a chest or a fridge in which a child can lock in himself without being able to get out afterwards).

VVVQV-It was the fact that he was'nt thinking what repercussions saying that to them could happen.Saying that I have no idea about children was really hurtful to me,I thought I knew my children pretty well.

Chandra-It was a samsonite case with a lock on it and that is why I was so concerned.It is kept in the locked garage but the children had it out earlier in the day playing holidays with it under my supervision.

Probably me just getting over protective again as I do tend to forsee danger in things whilst the children are playing and always thinking "what if this happened"

DH says I need to relax more and let them just play.

Maybe he was embarrassed - he knew it was a silly thing to say to your DS as soon as you'd pointed it out to him and snapped at you....my DH is a bit like that, then he'll apologise later.

If I asked my dh if he was right in the head in front of my children he would be a bit miffed too.

DH did say it in a nasty tone and he did not apoligise later.He was angry because he thinks I try to spoil the childrens fun by being to worried about everything all the time.
I might add that he had had a few beers and so was like he always is after a drink more loud and tends to do things over the top with the children more than what he would if he had'nt had a drink.This was my worry I suspose that he was'nt thinking straight.

Also when I was suffering with PND he would often make comments about me having been mad for the 2 years after dd was born so the comment probably hit a raw nerve with me.

He sounds lovely. Go and get him another beer.

tbh I think it was 6 of one and half a dozen of the other. You tell your dh that he's not right in the head and expect him to take that on board and yet you're hurt when he effectively says the same to you in return? Imo if you're expecting him to apologise then he should be expecting the same of you as ultimately, you started it. Sorry to be blunt but he's their father and most likely wouldn't deliberately put them in danger? And yes, imo you are being over protective as they were playing with the suitcase while under supervision. If you can't trust your dh to play with his own children then you should maybe seriously question the relationship you are all in.

Was you saying 'are you right in the head' just one of those things that came out but you wish it had come out differently? I wouldn't want my dh to put ideas like that into our dd's head, shes only 4 months but I would worry in the future aboput what she hears, even a seemingly innocent comment and what ideas it might give her.
I think it mean of him to say that you have no idea about children, is he perfect at childcare?

I think both said more or less the same thing, that the other one was not right on ther head....but he added that she didn't know anything about children, which I think it's a disgrace. Besides, how much can he know about children if he can't control himself after a few beers?

I just read your comment about your PND. He said you were 'mad'? He sounds really insensitve, does he say things to you frequently? Whether he's had a drink or not, saying things like this will not have a good affect on you or on your children if they hear???