Connection = mutual demons?

[ALittleStranger]

I read something by another poster recently that has really got me thinking. It was along the lines of what you think is a great connection with someone you have just met may actually be recognising compatible demons in each other.

I met someone a few months ago who I felt very connected to very quickly. However, I've not got properly involved with him as he's been going through some intense personal things which have scared me off. But the connection persists and I keep bouncing around when I should just shit or get off the pot. After reading the above something clicked and I'm now wondering whether this "connection" is just mutual neuroses. I put a lot of effort into being "adjusted" but my attitude towards relationships can still be pretty screwed (Anhedonic, avoid intimacy etc).

What do people think, can an apparent connection actually be something to fear?

Possibly. We are drawn to people that reflect something of ourselves. For example, I get chewed out a lot here for saying dates with depression are a PITA and to be avoided. Others - often with depression - tell me that I'm a heartless cow and presumably that means, if they met someone with the same symptoms as themselves, they'd stick around being all sympathetic.

Or it could simply be a sort of emotional rubbernecking. You know you should really look the other way and keep wallking but his problems provide a morbid fascination.

Sounds like you should make the effort to kick this one into touch.

I don't think it's emotional rubber-necking, I have no desire to fix his problems at all. They've stopped me getting involved but perhaps you're right and a line needs to be drawn.