Feeling a bit defeated today

[Spree]

My marriage is failing (he cheated), I am abroad and trying to apply for jobs back in the UK (and after having been out of the full time workforce for 7 years).

Got a knock back from my old firm today (similar role to what I did 7 years ago but a little expanded).

I just want to get back to the UK, get a job, be independent and live in a separate house to H.

I feel really defeated today (which is unlike me as I'm normally the most positive person).

Can't have separate house here due to costs but already in separate rooms.

Sorry, on phone and couldn't add to message.

I also feel increasingly bitter that I gave up my career to support his out here and to give my DC the best of me.

I feel really shafted

I'm sorry you're struggling and that you're so far from home. Do you have relatives or friends in the UK that you could stay with temporarily until you find work?

You'll get through this.

Oh poor you, Spree. I felt just like that when my H cheated, re my career, which had taken a dive in the previous two years. I can remember boiling with rage that if I left him we would have to spilt assets, even though he now earned more than me and the house had originally been my asset pre meeting.

It really isn't fair on women sometimes, the while divorce issue.

Still, if you are usually positive , I'm really sure those feelings will return and you will find a way through. It will be ok. And you are still not a spineless cheat.

My difficulty with going to the UK right now to job hunt is leaving my DC in schools here - he travels with job so cannot be relied on to do f/time childcare.

If anyone has any really positive stories about getting back on their feet (career & otherwise), post divorce or having taken a few years out as SAHM - would love to hear it

" he travels with job so cannot be relied on to do f/time childcare."

I think that's just something you put at his door and tell him to get on with. He's the one that has broken up the family. He has to take the responsibility. So it means he has to stop travelling for a while and look after his own children or arrange some child-care.... welcome to the real world STBXH right?

I took just over three years out as a SAHM and contacted an old colleague on LinkedIn as I saw he had moved firm.

He passed on my interest to his boss, who contacted me, and I started there about two years ago.

It can be done, contact everyone you know in similar firms, LinkedIn contact everyone you can, see where old colleagues have moved to...

I really feel for you, it's so demoralising isn't it...

Personally, I wouldn't mention the marriage breaking down to any potential employers. I would say 'we are moving back to the UK and I will be available for work from March 1st' or whenever you pick. Take part time if you have to as you may be able to up hours later.

Good luck

LinkedIn - good one - I always look for jobs on it but didn't think to ask my contacts