in-laws; what can I do with them on my DS birthday?????

[sparklemagic]

The thread about parties recently started me thinking about DS' birthday which is coming up. I have arranged that we (me DH and DS) will spend his actual birthday together on a big day out. It's on a Friday so in-laws will be at work on the day anyway.

Obv. we will have to see them and I thought I would invite them on the following day....but what can I DOOOOOOOOO with them? It will be the PIL and the SIL, her DH and two kids. I can't stress enough how different we are, our parenting styles are poles apart, all our opinions are poles apart, there is no safe subject that I can talk about with them that won't send me demented!!! PIL's just sit on their bums on the sofa and ignore DS so he's not that keen on them coming anyway

My house and life in general will be judged mercilessly and I can't stand it.

What can I do to ensure they a) don't stay long and b) get up off the sofa at least once!!!

Any thoughts?

Oh I sympathise/empathise so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How about a picnic tea? In the park? With everybody bringing food to share? Or meet at an adventure playground - you'll be far too busy to talk.

Arrange a picnic in the park or if it's wet, lunch at one of those restaurants with a playground. If they start to get on your nerves, you can disappear off to organise a game of footy or to supervise in the ball pit!

It' the right time of year to just get out somewhere, so I would suggest that too!

all go out for the day, local park for a birthday picnic,zoo or such like. The advantage of going out is that if it gets to much for you, you can easily slip away for a while on the pretence that you got lost/needed loo/had to look at a very interesting "thing" without causing to much offence

Great minds think alike! Two pretty identical posts so we must be right!

thanks everyone! very good thought to do it out of the house, it will hopefully force them to get a bit more involved! Dunno why I didn't think of it!

If it's dry then we will be fine, a picnic in the park sounds brilliant and we have a nice big one just round the corner

If it's wet then it will be more difficult, only because DS has got ants in his pants, and isn't a huge eater, so lunch in a restaurant would be a MAJOR judging point for them (SIL's children are drilled into sitting and waiting, we don't want to do this to DS so have avoided restaurants so far because of this!) I guess we could meet at a soft play place instead....but there would be difficulties in present opening and storing if we were in our local place, which is small. Any other amazing ideas for indoor things?

What part of the country are you in?

And how old is your ds and other children to be catered for?

we are in the sarf, quite near the sea (so a beach picnic also a dry day possibility!).

The other kids are 5 (a boy) and 3 (a girl), so they are all quite similar in age.

What's your story tooticky, I am intrigued that you seem to understand the situation so well!

ooh, sorry meant to say my DS will be 4 on his birthday.

Well, my dp's mum has her opinions, and from time to time we hear them. She's also the type who doesn't get off her bum (except to smoke by the back door as I have said no to smoking indoors - we stayed one night at her house once, she and dp smoked constantly - or so it seemed - all windows were shut and we weren't allowed in the garden in case we brought mud in - but that's another story!)
According to her, the house is filthy and desperately untidy (I know it's not great but I do have 4 kids and different standards!), the children are all rude and badly behaved (maybe, and they're always worse when there's a visitor and they are used to my mum who lets them get away with anything, and dp's mum doesn't visit often enough for the kids to suss "how to behave when Nan is here" - but she doesn't make any allowances).
Actually, I don't think she'll be visiting any more after she got terribly upset because her Christmas present was a) late (she was away for Christmas so we posted afterwards) and b) not quite what she wanted. We are back on speaking terms though...or he and she are...I'm still not overly happy about the dirty house comments - apparently the only reason she had "refrained" from mentioning it before was that she was sure the midwife (!) or my mum would have mentioned it.
She also thinks I'm a spendthrift because I buy organic food and she can't see the point in recycling!
Having said that, and now feeling a little guilty, she can be nice too.
Goodness, that was a rant and a half!

Aquarium type place? They are generally good for wet days. There is one at Weymouth and one at Portsmouth - probably lots more.
Or just decide on a jolly hike through the countryside and never mind the weather - they might not even want to come

Or Brownsea Island? If you're further east, I don't know.