Good things about being due close to SIL!

[JuniorMint]

Hi,

I am 6 weeks pregnant, have not told anyone yet (apart from DH!), but SIL (DH's brother's girlfriend) has just announced she is 14 weeks! Total shock, but really happy for them of course. However, I am having a little wobble that our babies will be around 2 months apart (with ours being the younger!) and will be constantly compared! Both babies will be MIL's first grandchildren.

I wouldn't say we are very close to BIL and SIL; they actually live abroad most of the year and travel a lot with his job. We probably see them 3-4 times a year.

It's also driving me crazy having to keep our news quiet for the next little bit, while theirs is out in the open!

Please tell me all the good things about being due close together and the cousins being so close in age!

Thanks :)

You don't 'have' to keep your news quiet! Just tell them.
As for comparing, well I just wouldn't get involved!
Good luck.

Congratulations!

Exactly the same situation with my dd and my brothers ds. They are 4 months apart with my dd the younger.

I will start off by saying that yes, they will be compared constantly (but as the parent of the more advanced one that's ok )

But honestly, they are the best of friends. They are into the same toys games etc, can communicate well with each other as they are at a similar development stage. We only see dn every two weeks but they act like they have never been apart. My dd is now 4.9 and dn is almost 5.

Being pg the same time as sil was fine and gave me an insight as to what was to come. Same with baby, weaning etc. I watched and avoided what wasn't working iyswim?

Dd is 4.7 (sorry)

Thanks for your replies :)

Notmadeofrib- I do want to tell them, we are actually seeing them mid-October and want to tell them face to face then. DH did say he was SO close to blurting it out when his DB phoned to tell him, but we had literally only found out 3 days before and I was just 2-3 weeks.

Haylebop12- that sounds good, I do think it will be good to text each other and compare notes as we go along!

Don't let this spoil things. My DS and my cousin's (she's also my bff) DS are 3 months apart. My DS is younger. They do get compared BUT they both have strengths and weaknesses, eg. Cousins DS is as smart as a whip, my DS is eccentric to say the least. However, my DS is very emotionally intelligent and can go to the toilet, unlike his cousin, so it all pans out in the end :) be glad they will have a cousin to be good friends with - I love the relationship our boys have. It makes me and my cousin feel great and we love to see them together and imagine all the stuff they'll do together in the future. Good luck with your pregnancy.

Me and my sis in law were 7 weeks apart in our pregnancies (it ended up being 10 weeks - I was late, she was early) and it's honestly been brilliant. Our DDs are just starting to play properly together (they are 1 and 11 months) and me and SIL have spent lots of time together, enjoying our maternity leave, when we didn't a huge amount before.

One of the advantages of going 'second' is that you can always ask them about each stage and what happened with their pregnancy/labour/baby and you get lovely hand me downs!

Oh and yes comparisons are annoying, I do feel jealous sometimes if their DC is getting more attention but I realise quickly that it's pretty pointless and pathetic All babies develop differently.

I'm about six months behind my SiL. So far, we've had lots of hand-me-downs, and it's been good to have someone very sympathetic about late pregnancy. We don't see them a great deal, because they live a little far away, and travelling with a small baby/heavily pregnant isn't that straight forward - but I'm looking forward to having cousins close in age.

My 2 SILs and I all had babies one year, and again the next year, so 6 cousins all under 23 months, some as little as a month apart. It's been brill! As Art says, it all pans out in the end! One DNephew was a stunningly beautiful baby where my DS was a spotty, snotty baby - we used to joke we'd swap: me for DN's beauty but my SIL for my quirky boy who slept through early, and was very happy, whereas DN was difficult. The cousins are now teens and still close.

Yes Vulva - hand me downs! Fantastic! I had soooo much lovely stuff for free!

Thanks for these everyone! Very positive :) I am liking the idea of them being friends as teens and beyond, I am fairly close to my cousins.

They have found out they are having a boy, I wonder whether the sex of our baby will affect the comparisons and so on.

6 months between DS and DNeph. They have played together at least once a week, holidayed together, grown up together. They are 16 now and best of friends but better as they are family.