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Relationships

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Feel so guilty

3 replies

StupidMistakes · 22/09/2013 15:43

I had a male friend move in with me for a while, we were friends with benefits and sort of did what normal couples do whilst not being in a relationship. The main reason for that was because I was too messed up at the time for a relationship and he was aware of this, but he stood by me anyway, needing somewhere to live and I think he enjoyed the female company. We shared the bed every night and I never felt awkward about that. He knew there was someone I was close to in a FWB kind of way and he knew I used to go and see them, he would talk about different girls and would go out also. we lived together til I lost my home. Last night me and him had a chat on whatsapp, sort of went like, do you think you could be with one girl, him saying yes, me saying just not me and him saying he never said that, and me saying well when we lived together you were seeing other people and him telling me nope there was only ever me, I know feel incredibly guilty that I let him slip through my fingers when I had the chance and that I was going to see someone else, which must have been hurting him. I wish so much that I hadn't now because he is the only man to have ever stood by me and been there no matter what. He still is. He says its ok, but I don't think it is

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 22/09/2013 15:46

You win some you lose some... If everyone had wanted it to be exclusive at the time, it would have become exclusive. You may have let him slip through your fingers but he wasn't exactly begging you to stay. If he says it's OK, it's OK and you move on with your life, lesson learned.

CoffeeTea103 · 22/09/2013 15:55

You feel guilty but it's more to do with him standing by you through your difficult situations. If you felt strongly about him at that time you wouldn't have done the fwb thing with the other person. Maybe now in hindsight you see the great person he is but at that time it wasn't the right situation for you so don't beat yourself up about it.

StupidMistakes · 22/09/2013 16:07

It wasn't the right time and I think he knows that. I just sometimes feel like my actions hurt him, he was letting me do what I needed to in order to deal with everything, we are still close and I know I can still talk to him about anything, Its a mess, cos even now we still always end up back at each other from time to time, I have stood by him as well, throughout the last year, when he needed to be away from home and no one know where I kept my mouth shut, went to see him as often as I was able to. Sad

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