I don't know what to do. DH and I keep arguing about cleaning, it is so bloody tedious. I am a SAHM to our little boy who is 16 months old. He is cruising but not walking OR crawling so leaving him unattended is basically going to result in him falling over and whacking his head on our hardwood floors. He starts crying about five minutes sitting down as he wants to walk around. So I find it difficult to do jobs around the house but I always get the basics done: clothes washing and drying, cooking, washing up, wiping surfaces, wipe up after every mealtime when stuff has bee thrown everywhere, keep the bathroom reasonably clean (clean toilet every few days/wipe surfaces every day and generally try and keep it tidy). DH works long hours and although we share the early wakings (5:45-6 most mornings, I am planning on trying to drop a nap to make him sleep later), he usually doesn't get home until after DS has gone to bed.
This morning was DH's turn to get up, after a busier than usual week for him. We've hardly seen each other all week as I like to get to bed by 10 regardless of if I'm getting up early as DS is being really challenging at the moment and I find it a bit exhausting. So I get up at 8am to find H stomping around in a huff that he's had to clean up. Basically we had another row, the essence of which is that he has higher cleaning standards than I do (which I imagine is pretty common, one person thinking things should be cleaner?)
I am sick of arguing about it. He has said before that he thinks its easy being at home with DS (after he looked after him for 3.5 days while I was away for the weekend, despite the fact his mum came and took DS out so H could do jobs 
) and he thinks I should do more housework. I think I do enough. My priority is spending quality time with DS and taking him to baby groups/ the park etc. not wiping the blinds.
What can we do about this? I was thinking about drawing up a chores list (making sure some things are assigned to DH). I'm not sure how we move forward. I suppose bubbling under the surface is that I feel under appreciated and he feels I have an easy life and is resentful about going out to work. Don't see how we can change this either.
Please help. I hate arguing with him, he says nasty things which make me say nasty things then it all gets out of hand 