I have posted before about my PIL but now i really need some help as i feel this situation is getting really silly now.
I'll give you abit of back story first of what used to happen.
We have a DD1. MIL refused to stop smoking around her as it was her house and she'll do what she wants in it, if it bothers us that much don't bring her up.
So we didn't. She comes to our house once a week to visit.
My husband then worked part time. MIL also works part time, they both finished about 1/2 in the afternoon ao he would drive to pick her up from work, take her home, drive her to our house, she would sit on the sofa, moan for an hour, drink tea and then husband would take her home.
This worked fine untill she started cancelling alot saying that it was awkward for her.
So we set days aside which was best for her, she'd cancel..we asked when it was best for her which was evenings so they came down then, still cancelled, then changed to weekends, she'd cancel..this went on and on. my husband was allways the one taxing her about. she has never made any effort.
It was allways last minite or the night before. we would change and cancel plans, we'd waste weekends/days off where she would cancel.
We would invite her on days out, meals out and she would accept..then cancel.
We had a word with her about it and she flipped, mananged to turn it round onto us, blame us,.moaned shw didnt see dd1 enough etcetc.
This went on for about 3 years..guilt trips, bending over backwards, us making all of the effort, going out of our way for her..so on.
About 4/5 months ago FIL got a car. They could only do weekends. Fine. So for a few months (still cancelling btw!) they came down either sat or sun afternoon.
Weekends were so awkward for us cause of how early my husband had to get up for work and other reasons but we didnt say anything and let them come down.
Now almost 4 years old.
Husband is now working full time, up early every day of the week and is finishing alot later (say about 4/5)
dd1 has started Nursery 5 days a week and has to be there at 8am, and we now have a 4 week old dd2 who is nocturnal..all this happened within a month. its.hectic and exhausting!
Due to husbands new hours we cant do weekend visits anymore as there arn't enough hours in the weekend.
We told MIL weeks before that within that 1 month what would be happening so she could organise transport/buses. she ignored us.
We told her weekday visits would be best, she finishes early, the bus stop is right outside her work and brings her round the corner from our house, she catches them every day to and from work, she is early 40's, healtly and lives about 10-15 mins away by car..30 mins by bus..5 afternoons to choose from.
She refused and wanted my husband to pick her up from work..he couldnt due to his hours (she wanted him to pick her up the day i'd given birth to dd2 after being awake for 24+ hours!)
Its now been 3 weeks since she has seen our girls as the ball is in her court now to organise herself and to make the effort. This doesnt sound alot to some people but if we hadn't of picked her up when it was down to my husband, there would of been a massive argument and we would of been denying her access to them.
Its annoyed us both SO much as for years we had to make the effort and go out of our way so she could come down.
Now its down to her she cant be bothered.
They arn't short of money so they could even catch a taxi!
FIL texted to say that she misses the girls so much.
If she does, why doesnt she come and see them!?
What would you do?
Would you just leave her to it?
I think ive covered everything. Sorry its so long!