I'm really asking for opinions on my relationship because I can't tell if I'm turning into a psycho!
I do struggle with BPD and depression etc. It is generally managed fairly well but these past few weeks have been physically and mentally exhausting.
My OH and I don't live together but used to see each other nearly every night and all weekends, recently he has (seemingly to me) stopped showing as much of an interest in seeing me. Not that he is disinterested in seeing me just doesn't seem as keen as he once did.
Our sex life has plummeted, he now never initiates sex or if he does he usually wakes me up to initiate it. Being someone that struggles with sleep this really wears me out obviously. He blames me for this saying that I am hard work to get going. He also has a great habit of telling me wonderful things during sex and how much he loves me but as soon as its over that's it, up and dressed and nothing after. No cuddles or kind words, as if he says these things to get sex from me. But why would he do that to me? I do sometimes feel used, but i may be being sensitive here.
What's got me feeling crap lately is that he has gradually stopped texting me. When we don't see each other I like to text through the evening to just shoot shit and talk to him.
I know hes not doing anything important because he says as much but he doesn't seem at all interested in talking to me or responding to my conversations or opinions. He now doesn't even bother texting good night.
I like tell him how much I love him and how much he means to me and, 9 times out of ten, it's never reciprocated.
Am I over sensitive and need to buck up or is he losing interest? I know I can be hard work due to my illnesses but I try so hard and it feels like just keep getting it wrong. I have a fear of being forgotten by people (it's happened so much in the past it's become a complex) and basically I don't want to be treated like a mug but I need to know if I'm crazy and need to chill or if I have grounds to feel this way!