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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling low please help ....

4 replies

golfpro60 · 10/09/2013 22:02

My marriage has broken down and I am living with my husband and young child over 200miles from family. Have some good friends where I am. My husband is manipulative and controlling. He has mood swings and I verbally abusive when he gets annoyed or as he says when I do something to annoy him. He flew Into
A rage last week over something and tolde he wants a divorce. Thank gd I thought as is easier to spectate if he wants it too. Had agreed to rent me a flat and as I'm a sahm needed him to be guarantor (agreed to stay in same area and not
Go home to family to try and keep a relationship between him and our child which I know is the right thing for
My child even though I want to run a million miles away
From him) however we can't get the new place because he doesn't pass a guaranter and now he's having second thoughts,
Now he's saying the effect on our
Young child are going to be awful and we should be tryi g to work it
Out! I know it's not going to work out. Feel so trapped. If I up and leave to go back to my family I will have to do it without his consent as he will not allow me to go, will take my car keys etc.
I want to try and stay close enough for our child to spend good time with him. But I also need to look after myself and get out of this relationship as I don't thing even with counciling we can work it out. Help! Advice needed! Feel so trapped

OP posts:
ApocalypseThen · 10/09/2013 22:04

Call your mum. See if she can help you organise transport and take yourself away from the situation.

intheduskwiththelightbehindher · 10/09/2013 22:08

It is never good for a child to see its mum being verbally abused and controlled. Just get away - find the local women's refuge if your family can't help you to leave. you do not have to put up with this. good luck x

frustratedashell · 11/09/2013 07:36

Do not allow him to take away your car keys, hide them if necessary. Get away from him. He's a bad influence on your child. I would pack up and go while he's at work I think. Good luck

BerkshireMum · 11/09/2013 08:19

Pack up and leave while he's at work - remembering copies of financial and legal stuff if you can. Go to your mum and take the time to sort yourself out. You may be able to return to the area where he lives, and where you have friends, when you feel stronger, more in control and understand your financial situation better. Where you go when you leave doesn't have to be where you stay.

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