I am so close to breaking point and I don't know who to turn to.

[Balancinglife]

I don't know who to talk to because I feel no one understands, not even my dp or family. Sorry if is the wrong topic.

I completely fell apart 3 years ago, literally one day I woke up knew I just couldn't cope, I was a separated single mum juggling everything, then my dp and I broke up. I didn't realise what was happening to me up to that point, I just soldiered on as you do. I'm scared because I feel I have the beginnings of depression again, and I feel like a failure. I ended up taking 2 months off work before, went into counselling, was on anti depressants, forgot to eat and lost a huge amount of weight, slept a lot, my ds kept me going. Then I graduallygot myself well again.

But over the last few months I have been feeling under a lot of stress, crying, snapping at people (not like me), exhausted, drinking too much alcohol just to help me cope, this is the first time I have admitted this my to anyone. I know why, it is my job. But we all need to work and pay bills, don't we?

I feel I have little time for myself as some weeks I work up to 47 hours, so I decided to get myself out and do a leisure course at college. When I told my parents at the weekend my df response was 'why are you doing that? you have enough on your plate from work'. My dm listens but I feel she just nods but doesn't understand how stressful my job is, she has worked part time for most of her life. I think my ds may realise as he has been asking if he can help me with things. I don't think my dp has a clue even though I have told him I am under stress (maybe he doesn't want to see it?). My friends all work part time. I feel I am in a situation no one understands, even my dp works a 32 hour week. He says why don't you get a hobby - I have no time. Round in circles. I am worried about paying bills.

I think I need to see my doctor. I need someone to understand.

Sorry if I am waffling. Has anyone been in a similar situation?

I think you're wise to go and see your GP, especially as you've felt like this before and know it may lead to that overwhelming feeling again. Your parents don't sound too helpful but maybe it's the only thing they could say to try and 'protect' you. Your DS sounds lovely.

Mention the drinking as well as it sounds like you're concerned about the amount. Take care, I hope things get better. Have you had any time off over the summer?

Aftermay, I have had a couple of long weekends off, I can't remember when I had a full week off.

I don't know what to say to my dp, I don't know how to explain that I am under too much pressure and that I can't cope.

Poor you Balancing.

I feel for you as I was that person. Lone parent, but no DP.

I have changed my life/routine beyond recognition over the last few years and the benefits are enormous. I stopped doing anything non-essential, and best of all, cut back on my working hours.

I have less money now but it is so worth it. Are there particular reasons why you can't cut back on hours? I never realised until I did it how much tax credits I'd get. Its worth checking out if you can.

Have some and try to get yourself a break whenever you can.

I think it's a really good idea to see your GP-it sounds like you may benefit from some kind of therapy and to be able to talk freely to a professional. Please don't feel alone.

working full time, 47 hours a week as a single parent essentially is enough to exhaust anyone

Do you work in sales/marketing or something? is there any way you could start looking to change to something more suitable hours wise?

I think you are wise to go to you GP too, but I also think some counselling will help. Will your firm offer occupational counselling?

Thanks, Girl From.

In a bind financially with bills. I have been going through finances recently with the help of Martin Lewis's and MSE. I know I am probably not alone. I just can't see how we will cope if I cut my hours.

Blimey, I was single mum one ds working full time too for 7 years and was perpetually utterly exhausted, and still effectively am as dh works abroad in the week. You have a massive amount on your plate. You need to do less, not more. Be kind to yourself. Speak to your GP. Is ds of an age where he will need less attention soon? Is DP a permanent fixture, hence able to contribute financially? It's all massively tough and i know where you are coming from completely.