Please tell me about successful third marriages with children!

[zazas]

My ex husband has just told us that he is expecting a child with his partner - nothing that unusual EXCEPT it is his fifth child with his third soon to be wife! His other children are 15 & 12 (mine) and 7 & 4 (2nd wife). My children are very upset as they are concerned that having a baby will cause what has happened previously and he will end up separating eventually from his latest partner - whom they adore (she is indeed lovely!) Unfortunately chances are they will (he is not showing any signs of changing his behaviour and boy is his behaviour challenging!) but I would desperately like to reassure the kids that third time round it can work!

So does anyone have any happy ending stories that I can share with my DC about how the man or woman 'grows up' and realises what is important and remains committed and happy in a stable relationship!

I can understand why you want to reassure them. But it sounds as if you have to remain the stable adult in their lives and say, truthfully, that you don't know. It might or it might not work out, and life is like that, and we (ie you and the children) can handle it either way.

Given what's gone before it seems highly unlikely your ex will ever finally grow up, commit, whatever. Not impossible, just unlikely, from what you've said.