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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can't wait till my husband goes back to work am I cruel?

2 replies

RatherUninspired · 02/09/2013 10:28

Ok so I really need a rant am hoping others have felt the same and know it seems I am being ungrateful, please don't judge.. Here goes...

Basically the title sums it up. My husband is on paternity leave and I am getting so irritated being in the same house as him day in day out. We got/get on much better when I am left to my own devices and he is at work. I can't believe I'm so irritated with him already though and our baby is only tidy... That's not good is it? Does anyone else just want to be left alone with their baby and feels like their husband gets in the way? He has really high expectations for parenting such as not leaving baby alone(even when asleep in Moses basket) and picking him up every 5 mins. I feel like he is setting me up to fail once he returns to work as I am no way going to be able to carry on picking him up all the time and neither to I want to. When he's not in the room I feel like I can carry on pottering about still caring for my baby but maybe doing a few more things as well (ie groceries) without him questioning me all the time quoting facts that he has read on the Internet about 'perfect parenting' I'm up every few hours BFing him and just feel like come on let's lighten up and give me a break. We seem to just be argueing this past few days and he takes things soooo personally I feel like I can't properly express myself and just want him to bugger off. What makes it worse is tht he tries so hard to be all nice etc and loving but it just does not work and makes me feel irritated by him and that I have to be happy all the time because he is kind and loving. I have to bite my tongue often to stop myself saying horrible things I'm sure I will forget but I just wish he would bugger off sometimes and take the hint. I feel so bad writin this as he genuinely is a v good husband i just feel very much trapped at home at the moment and stifled/smothered by him!

I do know I am lucky though and that many women would love to have the husband I have got...

OP posts:
needsomeperspective · 02/09/2013 11:27

My DH works away for several weeks at a time and I find I rather enjoy the peace and space when he is away. If he is back for a long time I do actually look forward to him going so I can do "my" stuff again without having to cater to him.

But I am always thrilled to have him home when he is due back.

I dont think there's anything wrong with wanting to get a routine in place on your own especially in your circumstances.

MortifiedAdams · 02/09/2013 11:33

Nothing wrong at all.

In fact, seeing as he is so.keen and sure.of what males the perfect parent, he can do baby duties.once he is home from work while you get some space. Get him doing bath and bed, bringing the baby to you for a bf.

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