Gambling

[goandshowdaddy]

Just found out that a close relative has been gambling, and is in a serious amount of debt. I have read a lot about the problem since I found out and am getting worried that it seems very common for the gambler to carry on or start again once they have been found out.

Does anyone have any experience where the gambling has come out in to the open, stopped and never started again? Grasping at straws here...

Hi there. Didn't want this to go unanswered.

In my personal experience (gambler dh), yes they do go on to do it again despite promises not to etc.

However I asked my gamcare counsellor the same question when I went through a programme for family members affected by gambling (sure you would qualify btw, funded by the industry so plenty of funding), and she said it is entirely possible for someone to stop gambling, if THEY want to badly enough.

So in a nutshell, despite your instincts telling you to help your relative, don't. They MUST do it all themselves.

(the only time I would advise going against your instincts btw)

Hope it works out for you.

Hi picnicfantasic,

Thank you so much for replying.

It's a bit difficult as the gambling relative is not close enough for me to really know whether he's positive about stopping. I'm kind of one step away from him so can't talk to him directly about it but obviously still really worried about it. He has had help from family with regard to the debts, which I know is probably not a good thing to do, but we didn't really know what else to do. This is all new to us .

I have thought about calling Gamcare - might still do that just to perhaps get a bit of advice that I could pass on.

Thank you again, and hope everything's OK for you too.

Hi goandshow

I would definitely call gamcare, even to signpost your family who are closer to the gambler towards it. It really helped me as they obviously understand and can give some perspective and advice. Gambling is so so destructive

I am ok, thank you for asking. Getting divorced but ok. As you no doubt know now it isn't just lost money but what it goes hand in hand with: lies, anger, dishonesty and total loss of trust and respect.

Wishing you and your family all the best.