How much do you rely on your parents, emotionally?

[CrazyOldCatLady]

DH is in hospital for the third time in 6 weeks. They keep finding more things wrong with him that may or may not be cancer and I'm desperately worried about him.

My mother's been wanting updates about him, and I'm keeping her informed. They're abroad because a relative died and they're helping the family with arrangements and I feel terrible telling her about any of this while she's involved in that, but I've got no-one else to talk to about it and I find I cope better if someone else knows what's going on.

Should I not be saying anything? Should I just get over myself, be a grown-up and cope, and keep my mouth shut?

No, thats what mum's are for. You said yourself she's been wanting updates and i'm sure your mum would lean on your for support if her husband was ill.

Hope he is ok OP. x

Horrid situation. Mums worry. I started the moment I conceived, as I'm sure most do.

Being grown up isn't keeping it from her. Its coping because you need to right now.

I expect your mum would worry more. If she suspected something was up but you weren't divulging.

I hope things get resolved for you soon.

We recently discovered DS2 has a life-threatening illness, and my parents have been taking it in turns to visit for the whole summer holiday. We would have coped, but they are wonderful support and have been cooking, cleaning, shopping, washing and looking after the DSs.

I'm 38, I still need my mum and I am grateful that they are still active and healthy enough to be of help and support.

I would absolutely be relying on my mum for support in these circumstances.

Talking to someone isn't "not coping". In fact it is probably helping you to cope.

If your parents are able and willing to actually be of help to you, then go ahead and lean on them a bit. [If on the other hand, their help isn't helpful/causes more stress, find someone else to lean on].

crescent

Interesting. The one thing I wouldn't I wouldn't tell my mum about would be rows, unless we were at the stage of splitting up.

Jamie - me neither, but everything else, yes.

OP in your situation I would be propping myself up on my parents 100%. Don't feel bad one iota.

Fingers crossed that they can find out what is wrong with your DH and fix it.

Sorry yes I hope your DH is okay and/or you have answers soon

Not on my parents, as such, but I do confide in a few people around me.

If you have no other support, then do talk to them.

I'm sure in her order of priorities you are first and the relative is firmly second.