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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Am I just being petty?

7 replies

sarahloula · 28/08/2013 18:09

Both myself and dh work full time in education. We've both had work to do over the six week hols. I have been conscious he has been getting stressed out about his work load so have taken dd out loads for the day to give him the opportunity to work. I asked for some time to get prepared for the start of term; dd and dh were downstairs. I was interupted twice in an hour. Dh decided he needed to do something so car upstairs and dd ended up plonked on my lap for 20 minutes. I told him how I felt but he just gets defensive and doesn't see why I'm upset. Am I just being petty?

OP posts:

JaxTellerIsAllMine · 28/08/2013 18:13

no not petty at all! Id be very peed off if the same happened to me. Can you ask him to take DC out for a couple of hours/day/however long you need so you can get on?

Lovingfreedom · 28/08/2013 18:18

His work and time is more important than yours (in his mind). YANBU

wintersdawn · 28/08/2013 18:19

no you're not, have similar arguments with my husband. a couple of hours break for him is total peace for me it's constant questions and interruptions.

Original poster

sarahloula · 28/08/2013 18:23

Thank you. That's how I felt, that what I was doing wasn't important. After he'd finished doing something on his laptop he said I could go and get on again so didn't see why I was annoyed. Is it too much to ask to have a couple of hours to myself to do some work? He did ask if I wanted him to take her out on Friday, but feel like I shouldn't have to ask bearing in mind the countless days I've taken dd out on my own. Why can't men be a bit more considerate sometimes??.

OP posts:

lilithtime · 28/08/2013 18:40

Put a sign on the door, "WORKING - Do not disturb!" And ignore him if he bothers you. Try the broken record technique -I am busy, tell me later. Repeat, ad finitum. He will get the message eventually!

Vivacia · 28/08/2013 19:02

"Why can't some people be a bit more considerate sometimes?"

I was going to suggest that you go out and work somewhere else (your classroom, at the library, at a cafe etc) but if he's offered to take the children out on Friday it sounds sorted.

DeckSwabber · 28/08/2013 19:24

I also recommend just taking yourself off for a bit. Then you are in control.

And do take him up on the offer of Friday. Otherwise he might not ask again. If you have finished your work by then you can enjoy some time off.

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