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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husbandd having affair and blaming me

22 replies

mumdaughter29 · 27/08/2013 23:12

Hi i posted on saturday night after finding out more about my husband's affair. He had said to me on saturday that part of the reason he cheated was due to my nagging about his drinking every night and also because i had gone from size 10 to size 12 with 2 stone weight gain. He told me when i asked months ago when i thought he was going off me was it due to my weight gain through taking medication he always said no. But saturday afternoon he said that a part of the reason he cheated was also due to my weight gain and did he not tell me before he would never fuck a fat woman! Well stupid husband does not realise that his e-mails from facebook are still coming to our computer and i have now found proof that he is flirting and chatting up another married woman (the OW he had his 5 week fling with has stayed with her husband) so now to find this last night my head is all over the place again. I have thrown him out and its 3 weeks tomorrow. The good news that i got today was a temporary job as a classroom assistant for 2 weeks and i am so happy for this as it will get me out of the house and not moping about. Maybe it will help me to get the permanent job thats coming up and i can put 2 fingers up to my husband. Just want to say i hope this will be the staart of something good for me.

OP posts:
mumdaughter29 · 27/08/2013 23:15

Oh yeah and when he was 17stone i never turned away from him but now he is a trainer he thinks he is gods gift to women!

OP posts:
hashtagwhatever · 27/08/2013 23:19

well done you. onwards and upwards.

ps size 12 isn't fat.

joblot · 27/08/2013 23:20

Well done for dumping his sorry arse and getting a job. You know you're worth more than that shallow git. He's just using pathetic excuses to justify being a tosser and behaving disgracefully. It's his character flaws that are the problem not your weight. Hope you enjoy the work.

Iamfrankieheck · 27/08/2013 23:40

What an arrogant tosser! If you ask me you are well rid.

Good luck on your new job...sounds like the start of a whole new you xx

thequeenoftarts · 27/08/2013 23:46

Imagine that you have just lost what 15 stone lol, well done on the instant weight loss hun xx

mumdaughter29 · 27/08/2013 23:58

Thanks for all your kind comments....i feel so much stronger than i did on saturday. So yeah hope this is the start of something good. Take care all x

OP posts:
lordleofric · 28/08/2013 08:34

Flowers Well done, OP.

feelingvunerable · 28/08/2013 09:17

Well done.

Here's to your new happier life.

EhricLovesTeamQhuay · 28/08/2013 09:37

You know it was nothing to do with your weight gain right? He's just making excuses to blame you for his cheating behaviour. Twat x

Feckssake · 28/08/2013 10:29

Next time you see him, remind him that while you can always lose weight, he will be a shitbag forever.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 28/08/2013 10:32

He is a sexist twat. HTH

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 28/08/2013 10:33

And well done. Hope more good things are on their way for you

Fairylea · 28/08/2013 10:35

Well done.

And many, many women would kill to be a size 12.

He is an arrogant twat.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 28/08/2013 10:35

Oh God - he's gone from a drinker to an exercise bore ... Yawn. Sounds like he has bigger personal issues than you

MrsMangoBiscuit · 28/08/2013 10:42

What an absolute wanker!! I'm Angry on your behalf! How dare he blame you for his failings.

Congratulations on your new job. Hoping it's the start of good things to come.

Dobbiesmum · 28/08/2013 10:45

Size 12 is fat?? Arse.. Angry
You are well rid. Stay strong and congratulations x

Wellwobbly · 28/08/2013 11:48

So glad you believed him 100% and got rid of his problem for him. Well done!

Now he can see how absolutely fabulous life is without you problem free.

I love it when men are called on their BS.

thefirstmrsrochester · 28/08/2013 12:33

Standing round of applause from me OP.
Congratulations on the new job and new life.
Thanks

anonacfr · 28/08/2013 13:09

Well done!

What a cunt.

Fairenuff · 28/08/2013 13:22

Congratulations. You will love your new job I'm sure, it's the best job in the world (biased Wink).

I posted on your other thread and am so pleased to hear you sounding much happier.

He's just being ignorant and trying to upset you. Take no notice. You have a whole life ahead of you without being dragged down.

mumdaughter29 · 30/08/2013 17:44

Fairenuff: Thanks for all your kind wishes. His mum told me yesterday (thurs) that my weightloss,make-up and looking good has been noticed by my cheating scumbag of a husband. Roll on Monday and keep your fingers crossed for me x

OP posts:
SheerWill · 30/08/2013 17:56

Great news for you!! The best thing is you realising your self worth. His behaviour is/was and never will be your doing but his. Now onwards and upwards. P.S. may I suggest listening to Maya Angelou's poem here to remind yourself daily how wonderful you are. It really helped me when my stbxh did the same. Best wishes. cx

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