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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Card from mum

42 replies

MillyMollyMandy78 · 16/08/2013 11:58

Some of you may remember my posts from a couple of months back. Basically my mum is a narc and dad her enabler. Wrote to mum over 3 months back saying i decided to go no contact. Got a letter back but nothing else from her. Dad also cut contact when he realised i would not change my mind. I sent dad a fathers day card and small gift but otherwise no contact.

Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary and have received a card written my mum saying they hope we have a nice day. They do this every year but just didnt expect one this time.

So just wondered what people think, as my head is spinning and my stomach flipped as soon as i saw mum's writing. It took me a while to get my head around choosing to go no contact and i know feel anxious and stressy again - not really sure why tho.

OP posts:
DamnDeDoubtance · 17/08/2013 11:51

It's hard isn't it. Dh went nc with his sister for very good reasons, she was making our lives hell. She still insists on sending cards and every time I see her writing it makes me feel ill, I genuinely have a physical reaction.

When someone has abused you so often and for so long it only takes a tiny thing to dredge up all the negative emotions and feelings of frustration. I bin all the cards at dhs requests before he sees them.

thegreylady · 17/08/2013 13:21

If my dd 'broke contact' I'd respect it in terms of phone calls and visits but I would still send cards on specila occasions.She might be flawed but the card is just a 'thinking of you' surely.

plentyofsoap · 17/08/2013 16:09

Sorry grey, but a card doesn't mean that at all. Its a way of upsetting the person who clearly means no contact. Mine were still being sent even after a police warning so its rather more complicated than that.

spanky2 · 17/08/2013 16:18

My narc dm turned up the day before my family holiday "just to give dgc their holiday money ." Actually it was to be able to to send me and dh nasty text and email about percieved wrong doing on my part . It is just the narc game they play. But we sent her a card and she still ignores us....Sad

spanky2 · 17/08/2013 16:20

You must read "will I ever be good enough ?" And go on daughters of narcississtic mothers website .

MillyMollyMandy78 · 17/08/2013 17:40

Have read that book Spanky. And that website is really useful - guess it's easy to know how to respond, not so easy to feel ok enough to do it!

Greylady - you are not alone in your thoughts, but my mum has never reached out to me or my siblings. The only time she thinks of others is when she worries about what they think of her! I envy people like you, who seem to struggle to understand that there are many mums out there who just don't care about their children and actually enjoy hurting them from a young age. I envy your rose-tinted glasses, but not everyone is a caring mum, like you seem to be

OP posts:
spanky2 · 17/08/2013 18:30

You are right . Even though I have just gone nc because their poison has now being dished out to my dcs, I miss them. It is sad really . I feel like I've been living a lie with them. Neither of my parents love me. Not for self pity just a fact .

plentyofsoap · 17/08/2013 22:29

It does get easier with time, but it is sad. I miss the parents I image I should have had if that makes sense? Nc is hard but it is the right decision to make for many people. Unless you experience it you cannot really understand the hurt I rarely talk to others about it as they do not get it at all. Remember you are not to blame.

Oldraver · 18/08/2013 14:39

OP there is a service where you can block numbers from your landline, it used to be called Choose to refuse...would something like this be helpful with regards to how you feel about the phone ringing ?

MillyMollyMandy78 · 18/08/2013 19:54

Thanks Raver, that would be useful. It would stop that 'what if it's her?' Moment

OP posts:
cozietoesie · 18/08/2013 20:13

It's still called that - details included in \link{http://bt.custhelp.com/ci/fattach/get/2431266/1335438547/redirect/1\this BT booklet.} There's apparently a monthly charge but I don't know much.

MillyMollyMandy78 · 19/08/2013 09:09

Thanks Cosie, will have a read

OP posts:
Hippychickster · 19/08/2013 10:20

Do you mind me asking why you want no contact with your mum? Is there another thread so you don't have to go through it all again?

MillyMollyMandy78 · 19/08/2013 13:15

Hi Hippy - happy to give my reasons. A link to my original post would be much easier, but i don't know how to do that. Is NC something you are considering yourself?

Basically my mum is very selfish and abusive. My sister avoids seeing her for more than a few mins a handful of times per year, and my brother feels obliged to visit but says as far as he is concerned he hasn't ever really had a mum.

She lies and threatens suicide to get her own way. And if challenged/ disagrees with you about ANYTHING she throws a full-on tantrum eg slams doors, screams inches from your face, hurls abuse etc. These disagreements can be from something as innocent as which colour cushion you prefer.

Yet the way she treats other people is awful: even as children she has constantly name called, told us how we ruined her life, how useless we are etc, whilst leaving all housework and most of the childcare for my younger siblings to me. She would also tell ridiculous lies about us, mostly to dad, then smirk behind his back cos we were then in trouble. She threatened me with a hot iron held to my face when i was a teen, and when my sister was a similar age she told dad and all our relatives that my sister held a knife to her throat (not true, as there was a witness and my sister was devastated). She rarely has anything positive to say and seems to love drama. When we were children she fell out with everyone we knew at various times, but they were always the ones in the wrong - never her.

She blamed all of the above on depression. But she enjoyed causing us pain. She would laugh and mock us if we ever cried infront of her. She would frequently scream in my brothers face as a todler, saying how much she hated him, then would laugh and send him to his room when he began to cry. That is not depression.

She is also able to turn her behaviour on and off, which shows an element of control/ awareness of what she's doing. She spent several months trying to get my dad done for domestic violence (not true) and tried to get him sectioned and had authorities convinced for a while that it was dad with the problems.

There are many things that she did over the years and it would take forever to list them all. I guess the last straw was a few months ago, she ended up being sectioned under the mental health act after abusing a policeman in public. She stayed in there for 3 weeks while they assessed her. When i went to visit her the first time, she literally RAN to greet me and showered me with hugs and kisses, called me darling etc - first time she has ever hugged me. I only realised later that it was all for show infront of the nurses. She showed none of her normal 'depresssion' symptoms, and the staff saw no evidence that she was ill. even thought they had stopped all her medication.They said she had a personality disorder and at the final meeting she openly mocked my dad and sister and bragged about how she feigned illness to get her own way. She refused counselling and showed no remorse. She actually showed pride in how she had abused us over the years. I realised that she would never change and i could be dealing with her shit until i was in my 60s or 70s. I wasn't prepared to do this so i walked away.

OP posts:
Hippychickster · 19/08/2013 14:34

Oh crikey, poor you. That sounds awful. I'm not considering NC I just wondered what it would take for someone to never want to speak to or have contact with their mum.

I can totally see why you would want to break contact. It's really sad. Sorry to have made you go through it all again. My mum can be a PITA but NOTHING like this.

I hope she leaves you alone. Best best luck x

MillyMollyMandy78 · 19/08/2013 17:47

Guess it does sound pretty bad when you see it all written down! Guess everyone has their own reasons for NC but I see it as being when you consider your life would be much happier without them in it, and are prepared for the potential fallout that might come from NC. For me, the fallout was my dad cutting me off when he realised i was serious and was no longer going to just toe the line anymore.

The card from mum was a shock but i was able to put it behind me the next day and had a lovely weekend. Guess there's bound to be the odd set back, but my life is so much better without her in it. I had cut down contact with her the last few years, but i am so much more relaxed and happy in my life. That little voice of hers that i always had in my head, criticising every little thing has gone now. So SO worth it!

OP posts:
spanky2 · 20/08/2013 09:19

Thank you plentyofsoap.

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