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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Party tomorrow, ex + new gf. Encouragement please!

12 replies

Goingtobebrazen · 09/08/2013 12:34

Messy and prolonged breakup with ex, who now has a new girlfriend.

Tomorrow we are all going to end up at the same party. I am determined to go and enjoy myself. Why should he have all the fun?

Just need a bit of encouragement!

OP posts:
Pantone363 · 09/08/2013 12:39

Go. Be the life and soul. Don't drink too much and descend into a drunken brawl.

Be aloof, elegant and smile sweetly.

redfairy · 09/08/2013 14:01

I wouldn't risk drinking at all if I were you. Make yourself look stunning and totally disarm them with a warm greeting. Then walk away without a second glance!

FWIW I have to collect my daughter from my EX's wedding tonight. Despite having remarried myself a couple of years ago I can't help feeling queasy about it so I know what you're going through.

I'll be thinking of you (insert flower emoticon which for some reason will not produce on this laptop)

Crinkle77 · 09/08/2013 14:35

totally agree with redfairy.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 09/08/2013 15:04

Keep cool calm and sober. Resist the temptation to look her up and down. Less of 'life and soul' more like 'I'm So Over You I Am Completely Indifferent'.

Quiltcover · 09/08/2013 15:08

One or two drinks for Dutch courage. Then STOP.
Look great, but effortless. Nice hair, subtle makeup, nails etc. Sexy but understated.
Be friendly, but not over the top try hard. Circle the room talking to lots of different people :)

EasterHoliday · 09/08/2013 15:12

the new GF will probably be really nervous of meeting you, so keep it cool...

WeGotTheKrunk · 09/08/2013 16:31

Agree with not drinking. Look fab, feel comfortable, keep smiling. Maybe have something arranged to look forward to after the party as a neatly-arranged get out? You could swan off at, say 10, with the words " Got another party to go to" or "I'm meeting someone," but actually you're just going to meet a trusted friend for a lovely glass of wine and a postmortem, or home to watch a funny film with a big slice of cake?

Have a lovely time, keep circulating, and if you feel bad at any point remind yourself of anything he used to do that you didn't like - and that it's somebody else putting up with all of those things now, not you. Have a great time!Wine

CastroIsDead · 09/08/2013 18:36

you're a braver woman than me i don't think i could go at all. have fun and don't get drunk seems like good advice x

Original poster
Goingtobebrazen · 09/08/2013 20:08

Hairdresser booked for tomorrow morning.

I shall stay off the drink as well.

Thank you for the support. Smile

OP posts:
Quiltcover · 09/08/2013 20:15

Ah good. If you feel and look good, the rest follows naturally. One drink for Dutch courage :)

WeGotTheKrunk · 09/08/2013 20:24

You will be fab brazen! Wear your dancing shoes and a big smile & have a great time.

Don't forget to come back afterwards and tell us all about it Grin

arsenaltilidie · 09/08/2013 20:52

Remember she's more worried about meeting you :).. But all this look nice but not try hard is a bit too much.

I'm of the line, who cares, go there enjoy yourself and treat him like a distraction.
The truth is it doesn't matter at all what they think!

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