Its really true u cnt know during the 1st mnths/weeks u r completely blinded. But do not ignore the signs. Try not to be readily available to him.
Let me give u some advice I also got abt how to spot player:
Certainly there are men you cannot or should not trust. But these types are easy to spot.
They say what you want to hear. They seem too good to be true. Yet they can be evasive. Or secretive. They can get too indignant too quickly. or make a mountain out of a molehill if you ask them a reasonable question.
Or worse they may even say some nasty things to you when they cannot get their own way sexually, or they can't keep a regular job. or they've had a string of romances that never last. or they tell you all their previous relationships ended because of what their previous partner did. (it is never them).
And YES they are really too good to be true. They are Players.
If he's secretive about parts of his life and only likes to see you for sex but then goes off to do many other things that he does not discuss with you then why have sex with him?
Such people have no problem telling lies. Telling lies comes to them naturally.
Being selfish and getting their own way always is what matter to them.
That's why we girls need to choose the man we let into our hearts carefully
Yes we need to love and respect and adore him.
But we also expect some stability. And he has a right to expect similar from us.
There are good men amongst every uncaring dicks
It is the type of man you are accepting as acceptable to you at the moment.
Develop a healthy set of values. It is the woman who sets the pace of the relationship. It is the woman who can say NO and mean it, until she is ready for an intimate relationship.
If a man will not accept a NO, until you are ready for intimacy, then he is not worthy of you.
Very early in a relationship neither person can be certain of the other. People have secrets. Though sex too early can backfire on a woman - the man can think the woman is so easy that she holds no challenge for him. A man likes to feel he had to work hard to gain a woman's acceptance. If the sex is delivered too easily then his interest in the woman wanes more quickly. He loses interest.
If a man is threatening to drop you if he has not been given access to your body for sex after one week, one month,or whatever time you deem as acceptable,then he is not worthy of you.
A healthy and potentially enduring relationship does not start with sex. It starts with respect and friendship. If he's offering sex first, with the potential promise of respect and friendship later then he's not worth the bother.
if he turns up late at night then he's after sex, not a relationship.
When a man does this he is treating you as an unpaid sex worker.
He wants sex but he's even too cheap to pay a prostitute so he finds an accepting woman to give him what he wants for free. That's NOT a relationship. That's being mis-used by a disrespectful man who is not worthy of you.
If he expects you to give him gifts and expects you to spoil him, but he rarely reciprocates in the same way then why have a one way relationship? You are worthy of more caring attention than that.
If he is absent for long unexplainable absences (seeing another woman?) then why bother to waste your time with him.
If he does not take you on regular dates on a regular basis then you are just a booty call. A man who is proud of his partner wants to share his happiness by being seen in public with the lady he really likes.
If he only wants to visit your home, enjoy your bed and a little comfort and then leave once he's been satisfied, then that's not a relationship, it's using you for sex.
Once his interest is waning then you will see the signs. But by that time it's too late. Emotionally he has already started to leave the relationship. For instance if he's off-hand and dismissive towards you when he's irritated, then he's not as enamoured with you as you hope.
A man in love wants to be with his beloved. He loves being with his beloved.
He does not put up excuses that are flimsy, to try to explain why he can't be available, for you.
If he does not demonstrate that he has concrete plans for the future with you clearly part of those plans, then be concerned. If this is the case you are just a side dish.
Don't fall in love with the man you think he CAN become. Because that's just rose colored glasses and an illusion in your head.
Look at the man he is RIGHT NOW.
Then decide if the foundations are strong enough and the supports in his life are on the right path to reach his goals.
Look at a man's character and find out more about his values and his attitudes to many things. Can he hold a job? Can he save some money regularly? Does he behave respectfully towards anyone he deals with, not just a pretty girl he is trying interest.
That way you can weed out the losers,long before you allow things to develop into something more.
If he always speaks to you respectfully then that's a good start.
Use this as your opportunity to re-format your approach to dating men. Try not to be so accomodating and co-operative with a new man. Step back. Don't be in a rush.
Observe, listen and don't treat it as imperative that you interest him,as soon as possible after you meet.
It's OK to take your time. Just over half the population is male. That leaves several billion men out there who might like to date you and who you too might like to date and who will be good to u
I got this advice coz I fell pregnant for a guy I thot loved me and now I'm facing being a single mum... I ddnt take time to know him thankGod u not pregnant please remember to condomise... I hope it helps u like it helped me good luck