It is always me that arranges visits to PIL but I feel like stopping making the effort as I feel MIL doesn't like me anymore andiI feel uncomfortable around her. We spent a couple of days there recently and had a few conversations where I feel she was getting at me/rude but would appreciate your opinions.
- She asked if dh has heard from his ex wife recently. He has a child with her who he hasn't seen for 2 years, MIL asked if the ex had been in touch about that. I said no and that his ex is unlikely to just get in touch and offer up contact now - that dh needs to take court action. MIL made several excuses like 've can't be sure where she is' and said 'not everyone's lucky enough to have a reasonable ex' which is a dig at me and also no excuse for no contact IMO.
- She kept fetching dh beers/food etc and telling him to sit and relax as he works so hard and is 'always doing everything with the Kids.' He works 4 days then has 4 days off and I do everything for the Kids, everything in the house, work part time and am studying for a degree. He has a hobby he spends 2hhalf days per week doing and a job which is very occasionally demanding. All comments about him working hard were made while glaring at me.
- She asked if I wanted wine. I said no thank you and indicated 14 month old dd as the reason. She then went off on a rant about how I'd have to stop feeding her myself soon etc. I said I actually didn't want to drink as I was taking Care of dd, not just because of bf, she said 'you're not the only one capable of doing that you know.' however, she had had 2 bottles of wine, fil had had half a bottle of whisky and dh had had ten bottles of beer - so IMO I was the only one capable of looking after her.
- She says every time I see her ' you've almost got.your figure back haven't you?' despite me weighing a stone less than before I had dd and being a size 8.
- Dd has only seen mil probably 5 times this year so understandably is keener to stay with me. However mil always approaches her crouching down, hands out saying 'i'm going to get/take you'. Dd runs behind my legs and mil walks off snapping 'she isn't like this when you're.not here' - she's seen mil just with dh once. Maybe she is different when I'm there, but if mil just came and sat and played with us I'm sure she'd warm to her.more than with the 'take you're thing. I feel like being petty and saying I'll go then, shall I?'
I could go on but appreciate this is long already! Am I being petty or would you not feel very liked/welcome in these situations? Should I say something or simply leave it and see if anyone else arranges get togethers?