Can I forgive him for this

[Iammrsbeckham]

Las night I found some disturbing messages on my husband's computer between him and a woman from work. These messages were from last year. Among other things it is clear that they had both sent pictures to each other and he refers on several occasions to be not being around so he could receive lots of pictures. I am devastated. I confronted him about it and admits it was well out of order and says it was all talk and nothing happened between them.

I don't know what to do. I am not sure I'll ever get past it. I am gutted!

We've been together for 18 years and have one daughter who's 2.5. I can't think of life without him but can't see a way forward either.

At the moment you are in shock from finding these messages that were hidden from you. It is out of order and disrespectful to you and your daughter.
Only you can decide if there is a way forward, you have been together for a long time. If there is a way forward then this is not going to heal itself quickly it will take time. You need to think about whether or not you are happy otherwise before this came to light.
It is hard once trust has been broken and it will be difficult whatever you decide to do.

As wasuup says, only you can decide. Maybe you could both consider counselling at Relate or somewhere, sort out the way forward, if any? Sorry you've had this btw...