How do you initiate sex?

[BrokenBanana]

Promise I'm not a troll, I know MN is heavy with them at the mo.

I'm just wanting to find out whether what I want is normal, I'd rather not say what until I've seen some what other people do though.

Do you pre plan sex for a certain time and date or do you like to build up the atmosphere with lots of flirting etc first? I'm talking about your average night here btw. Please be as honest as you can although I don't really need the gory details!

By touching him rather than rolling over and going to sleep

I don't build 'us' up to it for fear of letting him down if I don't feel up to it when the time comes. He doesn't mind being taken by surprise though.

Depends - if we're in bed he usually initiates it. If we're out of bed, I have been known to say, 'I want sex.' but I usually kiss him, squeeze his arse, rub his crotch and tell him I want him...now. I'm not very subtle.

I hang a sock on the doorknob.

I just had to look funny at my ex and he'd be up for it.

Sigh.

If I so much as mutter the 2 words Early Night his face lights up.

That's all I need to say to initiate it.

I think you must be married to my DH Nirvana!

I usually unchain him from the kitchen sink, order him through to the bedroom and then make him really suffer.

If I have a late bath.

Send a smutty text.

Give him the eye.

Get in bed naked.

Grab him as required.

Etc, etc...! :o

Lots of different ways, dirty text, push my arose against him in the bed, ask him does he want a ride, flash my boobs, ask him does he want cheap nasty sex or warm loving sex, touch him, fondle him, tell him I'm horny, kiss him etc etc

Pj's = no chance
Nightie = try your luck you never know
Naked = way hey lets go!

Actions speak louder than words in our house ;-)

hahahaha.

Sex in our house comes about in 3 ways:

1 - suck cock? DFiance to me.
2 - sex? Me to df.
3 - we touch/tickle/rub each other in passing or in bed which leads to 1 or 2 being said.

Tommy

It's annoying if I actually mean an early night to sleep, he feels cheated.

ha ha nirvana - he quite often says something like "I'm really tired - I'm going to go up now" when he really means "I want to have sex and I know you'll be going up soon too".
I usually "misunderstand" and leave him to his early night, have another glass of wine and waste time on MN

I kiss him.

I know some people think it's old fashioned, but a kiss, accompanied by touching of the chest and running of fingers through hair and around the neck really works.

A recent awkward moment:

"I'm going for a lie-down", I called airily up the loft ladder to DP. "Come and join me if you think you've got another shag in you".

Neither of us realised until quite a bit later that dd1(17) had come in and was in her bedroom next door with the door open. Oops. Poor child is probably traumatised. It's times like this I wish she didn't have a door key.

It gets worse...

"Your balls must be like pickled walnuts!"

"Raisins, more like!"

I really hope she had her earphones in. She certainly didn't mention anything later...

Like neitheronethingoranother.
The wiggling 'arose' in bed is the sure giveaway though

I find ' Fancy a shag? ' works well.Mind you we've been together for 44 years so not so subtle these days.

Brilliant, thanks for the responses! I'm a lot like most of these, can be sat doing my own thing most of the night and then say "fancy some sex?" And go up and have some.
DP wants the whole flirty build up every time, I feel bad for not wanting the same but it's such an arse on to dress up, flirt, and be sexual every time we want sex!

Will show him this thread :)

:) oh dear at the 17 year old dd hearing that :)

I usually just whip all my clothes off when dh goes to make a tea in the evenings and when he comes back in I'm naked ... he knows I'm up for it then!!

There's a time for bat eyes flirty and a time for a hand down the trouser fronts, and a hundred others in between - boring if it's only one way IMO.

I agree LazyJaney, the whole build up bit is brilliant sometimes but wanting that every time gets a bit tiresome.

Maras same here.

I've tried probably most of Lazyjaney's hundred different ways, but concluded DW wasn't responding to any of them.

So now I wait to be told. Sad, but true. Sorry, that was going to be lighthearted and self-deprecating. I guess one out of two isn't bad :-)