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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband suffering with depression

3 replies

peppajay · 27/07/2013 09:06

My DH has suffered from depression on and off for 7 years since our dd was born we also have a 5 yr old but the whole family life thing has changed him and he can't cope . Both kids are extremely active and my son is currently going through a dx for aspergers and I actually think my husband has aspergers hence the not coping the way the house has to be just so and the fact that he hates people!! Anyway he gets severe headaches caused by the depression or the kids just not sure which!! Finally got him to agree to see a counsellor and has emerged his childhood prob had a lot to do with it. He never went out anywhere and was never interacted with just sent to his room to play!!! Anyway the therapist has said as kids are the trigger keep away so he has gone out today and won't be back till this evening. Was hoping she would help him work through spending time with the kids not give him the easy way out. Anyway the relationship is suffering he is permanently depressed and hates his life as a dad. I feel like walking out and finding someone else who can be a dad to my kids and who is not so anal about the house but feel so bad because as his wife if he is suffering with depression shouldn't I be supporting him??

OP posts:
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/07/2013 10:22

A formerly depressed bloke writes: He needs treatment, although why he hasn't sought it earlier is odd, to say the least.

I had short courses of SSRIs to cope with oncoming brtesvements and later during a particularly bad period in DD's early teens. Eventually I made some life and work changes, had CBT and stopped drinking.

Support him through trestment, but if he won't go bring the hammer down.

Be aware that SSRIs kill libido, and then it comes back with a rush...

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/07/2013 10:23

Bereavements! Bloody phone!

Wannabestepfordwife · 27/07/2013 12:33

I don't have any practical advice to give just I know how you feel dp has depression and is going through an episode at the minute and the stress headaches are killing him.

You obviously love your husband it just gets so draining having to hold it together for everyone all the time.

Do you have any family who could look after the dc so you can have some me time. After some me time you might not feel as stressed and resentful ( maybe projecting the last part)

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