I'm feeling at a crossroads. My dh and I have been married 9 years and have 3dcs, 7,4,1. He is a good man and will do anything for anyone and is generally sociable, kind and good company but not really towards me. He's never been very demonstrative and not one to chat. I like some quiet time and I'm quite independent so it seemed ok before. Now with the strains of a young family and lower tolerance levels on both sides I'm wondering what there is between us. We argue a lot, or rather I do and he just waits for me to get it out of my system and then carries on as before. I've threatened to leave but this evokes no reaction also. I'm not sure I want to leave more for the difficulties of being a single mother and because I took my vows seriously and because basically dh is a good man.
I've suggested counselling, he won't hear of it, thinks its humiliating and it's all my issue. Maybe it is I'm sure he'd be happy with a twice a week shag and a mother to his kids. I try but find it hard especially if we've been arguing. Friends have suggested time alone and a romantic night away, but the reality is that any time alone we have we just argue and it's easier when were both busy elsewhere.
As in child things I think will this period pass, is it just because the children are young or should I force the issue and risk my marriage?