Why am i so unlovable??

[jogalong]

All my life iv attracted men that use me and never love me. Off course Im married now to a man that doesn't love me and has no respect for me. He is a bully and a control freak. I hate my life and Im beginning to hate myself too.
I see other couples and see how much respect they have for each other and i see how Im left to do everything by myself and go everywhere on my own.
Please don't say leave because Im not strong enough for that. We have three children so id never leave them or break up there home. Just feel so unhappy and pathetic.
I would love someone to give me the attention, love and support my friends seem to get from their partners.
Is this too much to ask for. What should i do or should i just get on with it. Really i suppose iv made my own bed!

You are not unloveable just someone horrible is making you feel that way. I feel for you. Can you talk to anyone about this? Would it be so bad if you were by yourself with your children? Do you work? In my limited experience of breaking free I have realised that it is more about loving yourself so that you don't let someone treat you badly. I think that is the key. You sound very isolated. Do you have anyone I rl you could confide in?

You are not unlovable, but you do have very low self-esteem, and a very low view of what you deserve in life. For example, right now you would prefer to remain in a marriage where you are treated badly, rather than to aim for the freedom you deserve.

I hope you eventually make the decision to break free.

I know how you feel Jog, been single 4 years, and only found men who want me for entertainment purposes, trust me, its your self esteem thats the issue, crap men can spot vulnerable women, improve how you feel about yourself, then you'll find better men.

Dont you dare think like that
Im sure you deserve for the best and shame for the person who make you fell that way

You can't get water from a dry well. Your DH is a bully and a control freak and is therefore incapable of loving you the way you deserve. Start by being good to yourself - The Getting Past Your Past website has info on this and this will help to raise your self esteem.