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Original poster

would you date a younger man?

57 replies

redhappy · 11/07/2013 07:03

I've never been out with anyone more than 2 years younger than me. The father of my dcs is actually 10years older than me.

When I was 23 I worked with a boy who was 17. It was obvious he really liked me, and there was a lot of chemistry there. But he was too young for me.

in now 32,he's 27. Last night we had a lovely talk on facebook. There was definitely still something there, and he made hints about the possibility of meeting up. I think I want to and the age gap doesn't seem as significant now.

What's it like dating someone younger than you? Good sex is my guess? My sex drive really kicked in when I got to 30 so we might be quite in sync in that respect?

What about a relationship though? What issues commonly arise?

OP posts:
maleview70 · 11/07/2013 11:32

I like the generalisation that it will equal good sex!

He might be lacking in experience in that department so it could be crap initially! Be prepared.....

Original poster
redhappy · 11/07/2013 11:43

Haha male view! You're the only poster to pick up on that aspect. Yes you're right about experience, possibly enthusiasm will make up for a lot??

OP posts:
pictish · 11/07/2013 11:44

I'm not a fan of enthusiasm. It usually signals an untimely end. Wink

TobyLerone · 11/07/2013 11:48

I married one.

He's 27, I'm 35. I can honestly say that there are/have been no issues relating to his age whatsoever. He is amazing. He is a fantastic stepfather to my children (12 & 13), and we have a baby on the way.

I suppose it could be a problem in theory. It depends on the people involved, obviously. But it works for us!

xTillyx · 11/07/2013 11:51

Go for it. It's totally different now he's in his 20's.

TheCatIsUpTheDuff · 11/07/2013 14:56

Go for it! Judge him on him, not his age. I'm not qualified to comment from experience as DH is 8 years older than me, but in my immediate circle, both sisters are married to men 4 years younger, and two close male friends are married to women 10 years older. All are happy, because their personalities fit well together.

Zyn · 11/07/2013 16:03

The situation you describe, yes I would. It's only 5-6 years and you're not an old woman! you are still young yourself. He's not a teenager any more, you're both around thirty, and you already have kids so that is not going to be an issue where you are trying to figure out if he's ready blah blah blah.

Good luck

MrsSJG · 11/07/2013 18:34

I am dating a much younger man, I would rather not say our ages as a lot of people would frown when it's on paper, but it works for us. There is a 19 year gap between us. It's never been an issue for us, but a lot of people would look at us and say no way

noddyholder · 11/07/2013 18:36

I probably wouldn't. Both my mum and my sister have/are. My sister is now 11 years on having problems re his maturity. And my step dad is only 59 and my mum is noticeably older now and their interests and likes etc have really changed

MrsSJG · 11/07/2013 18:36

I feel awful as my ex husband is threatening me with court because of the age gap, all I will say is that he is legal

MrsSJG · 11/07/2013 18:39

Now I feel awful and so wrong for writing it down, but he is definitely legal, I would never ever do anything at all illegal Hmm

MrsSJG · 11/07/2013 18:50

I suppose it's because of the taboo of the age gap that I feel strange, to be honest, it is the best relationship I have had, nobody has the upper hand in the relationship. Like Sam Taylor wood says if you don't see the age, why should it matter?

Lucylloyd13 · 11/07/2013 20:15

I love younger men, the sex is great and they keep going for ages.

MrsSJG · 11/07/2013 21:23

Tell me about it, the best sex ever! He knows exactly what I like and is so considerate

AnyFucker · 11/07/2013 21:28

In defence of older men, some of them are good at sex too

It doesn't automatically mean young man=good sex

Some of the worst sex I have ever had has been with young (selfish, porn obsessed) men

Give me an experienced, chilled 50 yo with everything in working order any day Wink

Zyn · 11/07/2013 21:37

yeh, give me one. a man who grew up before porn. :-| this is another thread I guess.

AnyFucker · 11/07/2013 21:38

Perhaps it is Smile

Original poster
redhappy · 11/07/2013 21:42

I was just thinking purely in terms of appetite!

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 11/07/2013 21:46

Nah, technique is more important

and my 50yo has a very healthy appetite

scrazy · 11/07/2013 21:52

Most of the men I've dated have been around 10 years younger than me. The only problem has been different stages in life especially as I was a mum and they didn't have children yet. It would have been a very special guy who got me seriously thinking about having another child at the time.

For what it's worth I have been in an on off relationship recently with a man 7 years my senior, who acted like he was 20 years younger Confused.

suburbophobe · 11/07/2013 22:27

I've been in a relationship for 8 years with a man 22 years younger. Not always easy (which relationship is?).

It's also a bi-cultural/racial relationship.

Still going strong though. Maybe because we are both single parents we understand each other....

The downside is it is a LDR (Long Distance Relationship).

So I guess it's a wonder it still IS going strong! Grin

Skillbo · 11/07/2013 22:36

This has been mentioned although not sure how relevant to your situation OP but would be my one caution.

Me & H who was 7 years younger, have separated not that long ago and I think it was primarily down to wanting different things and being at different stages. We were both in our 20s when we met but i soon hit my 30s and wanted to settle down; marriage, kids... I thought he did too but I'm not convinced anymore as he seemed to have a sort of early MLC when he hit 30 and off he went.

He now seems to be reliving the 'carefree' days he 'missed' helping me raise our family...

He is a twat though and it sounds like you're in a very different set-up but i think the 'wanting different things' is a pretty valid point. I never considered the age thing an issue - we had similar interests, enjoyed the same sort of things, didn't feel like we were from different generations but i would say it contributed to the fact we're not together anymore.. that, and did i mention he is a twat!

OW is also 10 years younger than me which i don't think is a coincidence!

Sparklysilversequins · 12/07/2013 00:11

Yes my last man was 13 years younger. It could never really go anywhere though because of it and I ended up getting quite badly hurt over it. He was lovely though Smile

TheStitchWitch · 12/07/2013 00:15

I'm 39 DH is 30, been married for almost 8 years and 2 DC. Couldn't be happier :)

Flibbedyjibbet · 12/07/2013 00:42

Me too, me too on the he was 27 I was 32 when we met theme. 5 years married and 2DD's do not notice an age gap. I still don't like to highlight it to new people but wonder if that's because I would love people to think I'm 5 years younger than I am!!

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