ten years of post natal depression

[lorrsi]

When i was pregnant on my 1st child i couldnt wait to have him, but when he was born i had loads of help but i still felt useless he wouldnt stop crying for me. went to GP told himmy symptoms he said it was becos i had him too young(17).He prefers my hubbys mum to me she spoils him. And now ten years later i still havent bonded with him.
I dont hug, kiss him, or say i love you.
and the other day both he and hes friend had being messing and were given out to by myself and my friend and they went off to hang themselves!!!! im at my wits end. i had wanted the mother in law to take him. hubby said no.. But he wont do anything about the situ..
I feel ive had to look after him when i didnt want him, my relationship has suffered bad, im considering leaving......

Oh Lorrsi you sound like you're depressed
I know it's hard being a young mum
Have you had any counselling at all?

lorrsi, you do sound in a bad way and it sounds like there's a lot going on there.

Your GP sounds like he could do with a slap! What's it got to do with him how old you are when you had your son? Rude bstrd.

You've come to the right place for support.

Hi Janos, thanks for replying i sometimes felt i needed to tell some one and at least this way i dont have to look at some one to admit how i feel.. thanks

Bluejelly, i tried counselling before but not for my PND, but i had brought the subject up, and was told i was doing the best i could.. and that the best option would be to be put in touch with family welfare, which i didnt want. I didnt need more people telling me how to be a good mom. I dunno maybe that wasnt a good decision for my son, i know he does his best in everything, it must be just me...Im perfect with the others.

lorrsi, have you thought about specific PND counselling?

I had it 2 years ago and it has really helped me, i have PND after my son was born and he is 10 this year and it wasnt until my daughter was born 2 years ago that i realised i was getting it again.

It was run by my health visitors, they said at the time it was a national thing, what about something like that?

CAT me if you want to talk cos ive had 8 years of PND and understand