Hi guys,
I posted about a month ago regarding my ex leaving me -
My bf off a year and half has just left me stating I can't give him what he needs and gone back to his ex wife. By this he means talking to my ex husband (who I was married to previously for 4 years) about selling the house we own together. He says I've never picked him over my ex and I've begged and pleaded with him, saying I love him, it's him I want and I will have the conversation when I'm ready. But it's not enough. I told him I haven't done it yet because of pregnancy (25weeks) and don't want the stress of all that and I'm also struggling with prenatal depression (on medication and receiving psychiatric support weekly) so just have not felt able to deal with sorting out house, finances. Have explained this to bf and rightly so I guess, he just stated 'what was your excuse before you we're pregnant'. He says he knows I'm not holding on because I want ex husband back but has left anyway saying he's sad he's wasted a year and half of his life with me, neglecting his own son (from previous marriage). Am totally heartbroken, he's always going on about how stress can cause ADHD etc in unborn children and he's gone ad caused me the most stress ever. He's not blocked my mobile number, blocked fb and twitter and completely cut me out of his life. I'm devastated. Crying non stop, I don't want to spk/see anyone and can't see how I'll ever get over this. Friends have said focus on pregnancy and doing best by her, but can't cope with life atm. He's finished with me countless times but never gone back to ex or blocked me etc and I've always took him back. I just really want him back.
Well we've been texting over the last few weeks, just light friendly chit chat resulting in a telephone conversation where he asked if I'd had 'the conversation' with my ex. I have had 'the conversation' and ex and I have decided to rent out our old martial home rather than selling it. Told this to ex bf and he went mental saying I didn't want to cut the cord with ex husband and despite my protests stating I'm not longer with him, we're separated, and I love him and want him, he wouldn't listen. He just carried on ranting and then ended the conversation. About 15 min later he text saying
There's no light at the end of this tunnel of mine, it now seems. Let's see where we all are in a year, shall we? Have a nice w/e, enjoy it the best you can. x. Then Then, like I say, see you are in a year (Back with ex hub , surely not) and then what the landscape looks like for those not on the inside. x.
I responded with
No Light end of tunnel, why cos my house isn't up for sale? That I'm not with my husband any more, that I've sorted out my forthcoming house and baby plans with my ex husband? Feels all ridiculous that I've just said I want us to be closer, want to share things, you be major part of my life, was plucking up the courage to ask if you'd come to my next scan and appointment with me because i want you to be part of this with me. That I'm being honest despite knowing it would piss you off (can't win really can I? Don't tell you you're pissed off, do tell you and am honest - get dumped!). Stupid me. As for have a nice weekend, sure it'll be fucking brilliant. Bloke I love just told me he doesn't want us to try. Great. Happy fucking weekend
Ive never spoken to him like this before, ive always pandered to him and grovelled and said im sorry. wish i had now as He then just text back saying forget it and we're over and he wants nothing to do with me anymore.
Honestly and please be honest is this my fault, I'm so desperately upset, crying and depressed. Can't spk to anyone I'm so alone and worried about the awful thought in my head, feel like I can't carry on.