dps work colleagues

[Attackofthefiftyfootwoman]

So.. nice night out with dp... after a few drinks he tells me his mates at work are either very inappropriate towards female colleagues or are having affairs. this really pushes my buttons as i have been cheated on before (ex dh left to be with other woman). He is now not talking to me; telling me i need to wake up to the real world. For me this is something that i would not tolerate from a group of acquaintances. Am i being too harsh/unrealistic?

I have learned the hard way after returning to work and witnessing relationships and inappropriate behaviour that its best to rise above it if it has nothing to do with you.

I don't agree with it and secretly hate the two timing cunts.

Very frustrating.

What his work colleagues do doesn't affect you does it?

I'd be more concerned at your DP's comments about waking up to the real world.

I think often work mates are often not proper mates. They're just people you hang out with while you all work at the same place. It is certainly true that many workplaces are rife with affairs, some environments being worse than others. E.g. I worked in the City for a while and there was a lot of it going on.

In a work setting, you don't really have space to be judgemental and put your foot down about other people's behaviour, because the less people at work like you the harder getting on in your career will be. So it may not be a question of him being able to 'not tolerate' other people's behaviour. He has to work with them and this will be very awkward if he criticises them. So I think you may be being a little unrealistic to expect him to say anything about their behaviour.

However I'm not sure why he got so cross and has stopped talking to you.

i have no idea why he even brought it up. it was at the and of the night and he told me that his colleagues are lecherous.considering my history i would expect him to be more tactful.

I don't really know why he brought it up?

But certainly within my circle of friends, and my workmates too, there are far more that have cheated, had a drunken fumble, affairs etc than those who haven't.

Frankly it isn't any of my business. I live by my own morals, and others by theirs. It's no more my place to foist my morals on other people than theirs to push on me.

I don't judge others morals either but I would wonder why my DH had brought it up in this way.

I wouldn't like it.

And tbh I'd expect him to reassure me it's not what he thought was ok rather than go off and sulk.

"You see? I could be out with all my colleagues having fun, shagging around but I don't! And I'm so restrained be cause of you so just be a bit more grateful for that."

That is the point he was trying to make, IMO. Not nice.

Did he express any disgust about his colleagues 'in the real world'? I also think he was trying to make himself look good by comparison. Epic fail...