Why wont he just leave me alone

[Muuuuuuumcanihave]

We s

You were saying?

Sorry bloody iphone touch screen!

We split a few weeks ago and its like being on a crap rollercosater, the first days he ignored me and dcs. Then he started calling to make arrangements to see them. Then all hes done for the last few days is ring me shouting and screaming at me threatining to turn up at my home. I told him i would call the police if he did. Hes now decided he doesnt want to see dc and is cutting all contact.

Of course all of the above is my fault. I really do hate him. Im glad hes gone. All he is is a controlling bully.

He doesnt want me back (not that ive asked him back) he hates me and wishes me dead. So why the fuck does he keep ringing?!?! Ive told him he must get off on upsetting me.

He sounds utterly hateful. Keep a diary of the abusive phone calls and any other unwanted contact. He sounds angry at you - was it your decision to separate?

Try not to let the children know what an arse their dad is being, and in time, when everything has calmed down, he may re-establish a reasonable relationship with them.

Meanwhile, write yourself a list of all the new opportunities you can take advantage of without such a toxic presence in your life, and the fun you and your children are going to have.

Take care

Thanks. Its realy hard not to argue back which i know is playing right into his hands. But he says such horrible things about me.

I will defianatly call the police if he turns up.

slow no it was his decision. I think the problem is that i havent chased him and begged him to come back.

Im already much more relaxed not as snappy with the kids and im actually making friends. I was always tense about the noise the kids were making or the toys everywhere.

He can probably see you are more relaxed without him and that's pissing him off. This will pass, there is a much happier future for all of you - kids need to make a mess and have toys everywhere, how else can we teach them how to tidy up?

"I think the problem is that i havent chased him and begged him to come back."

I think you're right. Controlling/bullying types are IME highly competitive and very sore losers. So, right now, you're winning and he's losing and he doesn't like it... hence the poo-flinging. Agree with the above to take a zero tolerance approach, don't engage with him, keep careful records and call the police the minute he steps out of line.