somebody help me get away i need this please

[khotney]

Hello

Ok so I fell inlove stupidly I'm pregnant I'm not aborting SD is gone. He ddnt even say abort or anything he just said its not mine and disappeared from the face of the earth. I'm so depressed I have no stable job currently and I'm in South Africa. I need to go over seas UK, American,Austrilia some were overseas and far Apply for a citizenchip,look For a job there and stay there for a while I need to be away from this depression untill I give birth. I'm so hurt. Can anybody in one of these countries ask for me how I can get a visa 1st and then citizenship. I hear small regular jobs are not hard to get there untill I give birth and then return home maybe I would have forgotten what this guy did to me and move on I have no plan family is far and not financially stable I'm the one who helps with these piece jobs I get here and send home. How could one human being be so heartless? I need to get away I hear it helps

Sorry to hear you are going through a tough time, but I really don't think that is a realistic plan.

If you don't have family connections to the UK or the other countries you mention, or aren't qualified in a job that is in big demand (eg medicine), it would be pretty much impossible to get a working visa. The UK has a very high unemployment rate at the moment, so there is huge competition for unskilled jobs. Also, getting visas takes months and costs a lot of money. Additionally, as a new arrival, you would probably not be entitled to free healthcare so you would have to pay a lot of money for childbirth, and you would have no family or friends around to provide support.

I think you would do better moving within your own country, if you just want to get away from your ex.

Hey thanks for the heads up I thought Uk was better off. I need some were different not back home were pple will be judging me for havung a fatherless child and broke I wanted somewere were I'm not known no one will be able to say nasty comments to me. I guess I have to try harder I need to be away really I'm depressed and alone, well
I have to stay positive that something will come before I reach the ninth month

Fleeing the country to escape disapproval is hardly a practical strategy - are you really going to be able to manage a baby on your own? Surely there are organisations in SA for support and help for people in your situation - have you looked into that?

If anyone judges you for having a fatherless child, do something for me will you? Draw yourself up to your full height, look them in the eye and tell them 'show me some respect because I'm the parent that stayed'. Lone parents like you and me are the heroes. We're the ones that stick around for our children, take the responsibility, make the sacrifices and deal with the problems .... we're not the cowardly ones running for the hills. We are bloody well immense ....!!! So just keep that in mind, don't feel like you have to hide yourself away and be proud, proud, proud.

I don't know the South African system but there has to be some kind of help available. Either state run or via a church, doctor or local community action. African proverb is that 'it takes a village to raise a child' so get fighting... and very best of luck

OP, as Ex has said, getting a visa for the UK will be expensive. From the limited information you've given about your current circumstances, it will also be pretty much impossible. I'd suggest that you have a look at the Home Office website which will set out the categories you can apply for a visa under, as well as the requirements you will need to meet to qualify for that visa.

However, I really think that you should consider whether leaving the country is the best thing for you and your baby. I know that attitudes in South Africa can be very conservative, but there are also various charitable organisations that may be able to provide you with help and support.

African proverb is that 'it takes a village to raise a child'. Corgito, this is an African proverb that was actually invented by Hillary Clinton. Why would say this to someone simply because she is posting from South Africa? What if this OP is white? Would you still spout village wisdom at her? It does not take a village to raise a child in Africa, it takes money and love and all the things it takes to raise a child in the UK.

OP, breathe, you will be fine. Face the situation, confide in friends. Moving to a different country will only make things harder for you. It is extremely difficult to get visas to the countries you mention, at te best, you could get a tourist visa, but work permits are incredibly hard. Good luck at home.

Wow all of you guys can't be wrong by discouraging to leave. Thankyou I feel encouraged and CogitoErgoSometimes mmh I like that and I will look them in the face and say it. In Africa if you fall preg the father has to appear and acknowledge responsibility and if he doesn't go to the family and do that you are labelled as damaged goods or a disapointment. I'm disapointed with me too but I'm the one who stayed like u sd)and even though I could have covered the shame and aborted I ddnt.

So thankyou Good people I'm staying I'm facing it and not running from it, 1st thing is telling my mum she is not rich but she will know how to help me even if I have let her down