How do I stop EA exH 'pushing my buttons'?

[catkin14]

I need a bit of help please.

How do I stop being manipulated/shit scared by a man I dont even live with anymore?
We have one DS who has contact with and are now going through the process of divorce which he is having a lot of paddies about.

We agree to stuff then he changes his mind at the 11th hour, blames it on 'something I have done'
But just speaking to him or even an email fills me with fear and dread.
How do I stop this control that he has over me? I hate it and feel pathetic that I allow it!
Any ideas please??

Yes, contact only through your solicitor.

Other advice I've seen here is set up a seperate email account, have cheap payg phone - insist on only those means of communication and refuse to engage in anything else. Make a note of all incidents, and with text and email you've got a record of what was said. There's loads more ways of reducing his power over you.

Definitely make yourself one-removed from actual contact as much as you possibly can. No conversations or instant messages. No face-to-face handovers for your DS. No verbal agreements. E-mails take your time to answer and put everything through a solicitor. Costs more that way but it's often the price you pay to get shot of a bully. The object of the exercise is to retake control as consciously as possible.