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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Help dh get his groove back!

28 replies

stripeysocks · 20/05/2006 16:25

I'm not a new MNetter, just changing my name to protect dh's identity!
My dh is 42, used to very sociable; when I first met him, I loved the fact that he had such a lovely, close-knit circle of friends; but for various reasons, (people moving away, divorces etc) his circle of friends has dwindled and now I worry about him. And he is worried too. He has no hobbies anymore, and the only people he can go out for a drink with are the handful of blokes he works with.
He sees he should maybe try to be more proactive in kick-starting his social life, but we're both a bit stuck.
He's not sporty, not an 'executive-type', not a 'rotary-club' type. He is very intelligent, bit of a philosopher, likes computers, reading, used to be in a motorbike club but kids etc kind of stopped that, but he's just lost his way IFKWIM. I'm worried he'll get depressed if we don't think of something soon.
Anyone experienced anything similar? Anyone got any ideas? How do blokes make friends when work isn't an option, he shares a company with another bloke with a workforce of, er, three!)
None of my friends' husbands seem to have much in common with him.
Help!!???

OP posts:

fullmoonfiend · 21/05/2006 18:14

why not set him a challenge - say once a month send him off to a different club/group/nightclass see what floats his boat? Most let you try a session for free first before committing.
Might take me own advice and do the same

suejonez · 22/05/2006 15:50

Oooh, yes forgot about evening classes. I've met some really nice people at my Russian class.

jac34 · 22/05/2006 16:06

How about quiz nights at the local pub,darts/skittles,evening class??
Couldn't he take up moterbike club again??

DH loves golf,he stopped playing for quite a few years,especially when our boys were smaller,but he took it up again about 4 years ago.
The father of our DS's friend,recently commented that DH should give up golf,to take the DSs to rugby on a Sunday morning.DH felt bad,but as I pointed out to him,you can't give up everything for your children.It's the only hobby he has,they do plenty of other things.It just wouldn't be fair.

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