counselling

[anicenewname]

I am a bit of a mess. I panic all the time and am not at all confident socially. I hate myself a lot of the time. I've been to see a Relate counsellor (together with dh and alone) for nearly a year about problems with our marriage. It has become apparent that I need to sort my head out. I need to talk about things that happened a long time ago, and sort out the panic.

I've been looking at counsellors online with the BACP, but don't know who to choose. Counsellor or psychotherapist? I don't really know what I need. Or how to start. Or what to say to them. Any advice would be great.

oops also this book is NEVER returned to me which is a great sign

It isn't a dry scientific tome but people like it and find it useful in my experience.

Hi, thanks for that

Hi, rang the counsellor, booked in to see her next week. She sounds friendly, but answered the phone in a different voice to the one she used when I said I'd rung about counselling, which was weird and seemed a bit fake. Like she ramped up the kindness in her voice. Maybe that's normal for a counsellor though, you'd want them to sound kind wouldn't you?
She is accredited by the bacp, has a recent masters in counselling, lots of older counselling qualifications, 20 years experience and supervises other psychotherapists. I'm nervous already.
Hope you are alright driftwood.

Well done OP. Go with your instincts. I really would try out a few and choose someone you feel you can work with. That might be partly about liking the person, but also consider how safe you feel, and how much you feel you could open up to them and share difficult thoughts and feelings. ExRatty you gave great guidance - really considered and accurate. Good luck OP x