Wow. I've only seen one of your other threads, jenny, and that was too painful to comment on. But after DontPark's summary I have to post.
You are acting out the life of my mother 30 years ago.
The mother I no longer speak to.
It don't have a problem with her leaving my father: that's her right. It's her persistent teflon refusal, even now, to take responsibility for her actions, and her willingness to sacrifice anyone - my father, us, family friends - to deflect that responsibility, that has destroyed any respect or possibility of an ongoing relationship. To this day, she keeps up a constant background patter of self-justification which necessarily blames everyone else, to the point I can no longer be complicit with it.
I found your previous thread chilling. It was the one where you were afraid that the children would prefer to stay in their own home rather than spend as much time as you wanted at your new, second household. Your solution was to force the children's existing home to be sold. You'd be prepared to sweep away your children's remaining security, as cover for your moving out, in the mistaken belief this would stop you looking like the "bad guy".
Please do not do this stuff.
You are perfectly entitled to leave your marriage.
But if you want a) to hurt your children as little as possible, and b) keep their respect, trust and love, you MUST take the responsibility that is yours. You must be honest that you are doing this for you, not scapegoat others. You must be honest that this will hurt your children, and acknowledge their pain if they need to express it to you. And you must not lie: people can adjust to change; deceit, not so much.
If you can do these things, you may well come through with perfectly good relationships, indeed a better family for your children under the new arrangements.
If you can't, you may lose them through your actions around the divorce, not because of the divorce itself.