I've been with my DP for five years and lived together for 2. DP is generally very responsible although can be a bit scatty. He's very generous and this is OK because we both have good jobs. He never seems worried about money whereas I often am. Since I've met him he's been into online poker and I'm no expert but I think he is quite good at it as he's won quite a lot of money (seems to me anyway) over the years.
He recently took a break from playing but recently has been playing again. He usually plays every night and has the windows open on the computer all evening. This causes arguments as I always say I don't feel I get his full attention at any time. Ironically, if I play on my laptop on forums etc while watching a film he gets annoyed and says I'm not concentrating, but he always plays poker throughout films, tv shows or anything we do together. These online tournaments can last for hours, and we've cancelled plans before when he's been in a long tournament. He also sometimes ends up staying up until 2 or 3am on a night before work. So I am already coming from a place of frustration about this, although I never thought he had a gambling problem, because sometimes its other online games with no gambling element.
Today we've had a horrible day. The plan was for me to clean the house and then he would make us dinner. I cleaned for 2-3 hours, did all the washing and made him numerous cups of tea while he played poker and watched football all day. Then I finally sat down to relax and put on a film for myself on my laptop. He decides to make dinner but his poker is still carrying out (about 6 different tables at once). He asked me to watch the poker while he cooked. I didn't really want to as it means I can't really do anything else, but I stopped the film I was watching and went to sit at the computer with the book I am reading. Maybe that was a mistake but I checked the screen every 20 secs or so. I was shouting out the hands and it was quite fast as there were six games. I then noticed a really good hand on one of the tables and shouted him to come over. I wasn't really sure what to click because I didn't want to mess up the game. However he didn't get over quickly enough and the hand timed out. Cue DP shouting at me and getting really angry about it. He apologised for shouting at me about 10 mins later but has been really quiet since. He is now out of the tournament but it wasn't until a while after this happened, so not really just due to my mistake.
When we had dinner I asked what was wrong and he said "I shouldn't have been playing poker when I knew I had to make YOUR dinner". This made me sad because it was OUR dinner and I'd spent the day cleaning OUR house and doing OUR washing and I hadn't even been able to watch my film afterwards. But I didn't say anything because I know from experience this would start an argument.
Now he's gone to lie down and sulk. I asked him if he was pissed off at me and he said yes.
It's only just occurred to me that it's pretty unhealthy to gamble this much and to get so upset when you lose. I don't know how much money he's lost but this isn't the first strop over poker he's had. Do you think he has a gambling problem? Or is he just being a twat? Or am I being unreasonable and is it really bad that I caused him to lose?