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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

Original poster

Am I OK to have casual sex?

17 replies

mcmooncup · 13/04/2013 00:13

I've got a date tomorrow. TBH I could go through the whole, "I'll wait it out" thing, but actually, he is hot as hell and I'd just like some lusty sex.

Wrong?

OP posts:

MichaelPortaloo · 13/04/2013 00:18

Do it. Use a condom! Enjoy

UnderwaterBasketWeaving · 13/04/2013 00:19

Are you a grown up?
Can you keep yourself safe (in all senses)?
Yes?

Then have fun!

HotCrossPun · 13/04/2013 00:20

As long as you are safe then I can't see anything wrong with it.

deleted203 · 13/04/2013 00:23

Hmmm...depends perhaps on where you would ideally like the relationship to go?

I see absolutely no problem in adult women thinking 'Actually I just want sex. No strings, but I fancy you and I'm old enough to do what the fuck I like'.

I do think if you would like it to turn into a proper, long term relationship then it's probably better to take your time a bit and let things develop rather than shagging his brains out on the first date.

This is purely because I have seen in the past that (many) men appear to mentally divide women into 'proper relationship' and 'hot casual shag'. If you give the impression of the second it might be more difficult to get him to think of you as the first.

End of the day, entirely up to you, however. Certainly not wrong.

CastroIsDead · 13/04/2013 00:29

if you're both single and both want it then go for it. lusty sex would be top of my list if i could find anyone hot as hell

MichaelPortaloo · 13/04/2013 00:31

I think what sow is saying is rubbish. If it's going to be it will be.

Plenty of wonderful relationships development after several sex free dates but plenty do after hot one night stands, too!

Estherbelle · 13/04/2013 01:03

Oh what the hell, DP and I slept together on the first date. Two years on we're engaged...

DioneTheDiabolist · 13/04/2013 01:06

Be safe and go for it.

BabylonReturns · 13/04/2013 01:06

DH and I DTD on the first date, that was 13 years and 3 DCs ago :)

TDada · 13/04/2013 07:02

Making him wait a bit not bad for build up of desire ....not a moral issue

AnimatedDad · 13/04/2013 07:10

As parents, we don't have as much time to mess around and play games as we used to.

Give yourself (and him) a present. You almost certainly deserve it.

You can work out where it's going later.

Branleuse · 13/04/2013 07:15

go for it!

neontetra · 13/04/2013 07:22

Go for it. After all, if he's the kind of sexist moron sowornout is talking about, who would shag on a first date himself but judges women for doing so, better you find out now! And he almost certainly isn't. Enjoy!

niceupthedance · 13/04/2013 08:12

Agree with neon... If he judges you for sleeping with him then who wants him anyway?

Go for it. I would.

AnimatedDad · 13/04/2013 08:30

Just to say, women judge men on the basis of sexual choices too.... It's not sexist. It's just dumb.

HairyGrotter · 13/04/2013 08:32

Mount up and enjoy!!

verygentlydoesit · 13/04/2013 08:34

If it's what you want, go for it.

Don't apologise, explain, or overanalyse- enjoy yourself. A woman who is in control of and confident about her sexual needs is a good thing in my eyes.

Flip