Is there an acceptable period before you have a new relationship

[beamer]

Speaking generally, what would be an acceptable period before you can announce a new relationship to say family etc, assumming you have been in a previous long term partnership ?

Not sure but after splitting from my husband I supose It was about 6 weeks before I introduced dp.
I met him just after I split with xdh

My last relationship was for twenty years, not sure how other people might react if I was to introduce a new partner after say six months, ( not that I care what people think ) but it's an interesting thought as to what some people consider appropriate.

I guess it depends on the situation and maybe the reasons for the split. I must say that I'm amazed that people want to get straight back into another relationship, so soon after another one has ended.

rickman - very true, I often wondered about how wise it was at the time, if I was on the rebound etc etc.
Wouldn't advise it really as every so often I do wonder if I should have jumped straight into another relationship so soon.

But having said that I wouldn't have ds now If I hadn't. So wouldn't change it for the world

Well if it happens it happens PP. :o I just can't imagine myself rushing out and looking for someone as soon as a serious relationship had ended. If one happens to fall into your lap then great, but going out and actively looking seems a bit desperate to me. Probably sour grapes though, I'm 2 years down the line and haven't even had a sniff. :o

Certainly wasn't looking for it at all, but I suppose thats when you're most likely to meet someone when you least expect it.

Anyway just been on the thread about all the annoying htings your dp/dh does. Think you're better off without one!! :o

I think - personally - you shouldn't give a stuff what other people think is acceptable and follow your heart and your instincts
life is WAAAAY to short to worry about otehr people's judgments of you, because they don't know the facts and anyway it is nothing to do with anyone else
I started going out with dh very quickly after finsihing another long term relationship. We didn't plan it like that, it just happened, but here we still are nine years and two wonderful children later

I ended a long term relationship and went out with my dh after 2 months. Got engaged 8 months later! Always swore I wasn't the type to rush into things, but it felt so right. I like to think I didn't care about what people thought, but I did feel bad about it. And had to deal with guilty feelings at the same time as going out with dh. Was really wierd and glad all those negative feelings have gone.

An acceptable period? I guess people expect a few months, possibly a year or two! But when you meet someone you want to spend time with, why wait? You might lose the opportunity. And you'll soon know whether it's a rebound type thing.

yep, and i've gone way past it, will have to get looking :o

Personally, I've always needed a fairly significant amount of time after a relationship ends to reflect on what transpired, regain my emotional equilibrium, reclaim myself as a complete and independent person (instead of being part of a couple), and think about how to have a better/different relationship the next time. That duty to oneself has got to be more complicated when children are involved.

When people move very quickly from one serious relationship to another, I wonder whether they've allowed themselves the time they need, if they operate differently to me, or if they've just been really lucky! But, as to what is an "acceptable" period of time, I think it's a very individual thing.

i split from a 5 yr relationship and was adamant i needed to be single for at least a year. But i got together with my current boyf 4 months later (and a month before finding out i was pg with someone else's child . In one way i hadn't fully worked through all the issues connected with previous relationship, but it has really worked out for me because my boyf is so determinedly independent that i wasn't able to fall into the traps of my previous relationship (i was very clingy and needy and dependent) and besides, i had the baby and was a single mum so also led a very separate life from boyf anyway.

So, i think it depends entirely on the relationships you're talking about. For me it was very out of character for me NOT to worry about starting a relationship with him, it just felt completely right, even though i had said i would stay single for a while!