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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Trust...when its gone is it gone?

6 replies

mrshectic · 09/04/2013 23:55

I know this is obviously dependent on a lot of things......but what are your views on the whole.

When u have lost ur trust in a partner/husband, can u get it back?

OP posts:

corblimeymadam · 09/04/2013 23:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

corblimeymadam · 09/04/2013 23:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhatTheWaterGaveMe · 09/04/2013 23:59

I think it depends on the individual's....

For me, no. Having this problem now. Can't see how I'll ever get it back.

Trust is like a mirror, once broken you can fix it but you'll still see the cracks - sorry for the cheesiness! But I think that's true

Original poster

mrshectic · 10/04/2013 00:00

Sorry, yes it is rather contradictory! oops!

OP posts:

deleted203 · 10/04/2013 00:07

Hmm...for me I would say that trust can be re-gained. Respect, more importantly, can not. Ex had a brief fling that he very much regretted. I trusted that he would not do so again as he didn't want the marriage to end and knew it would if he were to fuck up his second chance.

Sadly once I lost respect for him (due to different issues) I knew it was over for me - I couldn't be with someone who I had no respect for and just thought was a bit of a sad tosser.

Ouchmyhead · 10/04/2013 00:26

I think it depends why you lost trust in the first place. A few years ago I kissed another man, I owned up to my DP and although he was upset and said he'd lost trust in me, I worked hard and now we are happier than ever and getting married in December, it's not even an issue any more (I realise how lucky I am in this situation.) However if the trust has been broken because of something even bigger; a full on affair, lying about addictions (gambling/alcohol/drugs) I do think it would be harder to truly get over and earn trust back, but that's just me. It all just depends.

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