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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What should I do? (Probably sounds petty)

2 replies

mameulah · 28/03/2013 07:33

Four months ago our ds was born. We absolutely adore him. No problem there.

Since then my dh and I have had hardly anything to say to each other. Don't get me wrong, we do the 'our pfb is best ever' conversations but apart from that my dh has basically no conversation.

He has always been the quiet type, but now I am not working I suppose it is me that doesn't have the daily chit chat. I really miss it, and the attention I would get from him at that time.

He is a good man who I love so no problems there. But any advice on how to improve this situation would be appreciated.

OP posts:
DragonMamma · 28/03/2013 07:54

I think this happens to a lot of couples after their first child - I know I felt incapable of proper conversations for a while, simply because my life revolved around feeding, sleeping, baby development. All very boring really.

I found that making a conscious effort think of things we could talk about and really engaging in it helped. Even if it felt a bit forced at first, it did help get the focus off baby talk.

It does naturally get better though, I found the more sleep I got the less focused I was on talking about the baby (and what we could do to get them to sleep).

The old faithfuls like going on a date night etc do work, esp if you vow to limit baby talk to 15 mins.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 28/03/2013 09:42

I think you probably both need to 'get out more'. Difficult with a young baby but it's very easy to be bored and become boring if you've nothing to talk about beyond babies and/or work. Do you share any interests? Could you take up some kind of hobby together (or separately)? Do you go out as a couple? What are your plans for the Easter break? Make a conscious effort to shake things up and it might improve.

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