That's exactly what I was thinking, Inertia. This man is extremely manipulative, an inveterate liar and a con-artist. Textbook. Seen it, been there, I'd stake my life on it. The freeloading, heavy texting, 'pacing with child so you can't concentrate and, in the end, take the child yourself' and the 'constantly declared love' etc, etc - all cynical control mechanisms, designed to achieve exactly the reaction you give him. Sounds as if he's quite practised at it, too. And he doesn't have to pay a penny. Reeezult! I bet, Amykins, you've found yourself 'getting used to it', haven't you? So used to it you've forgotten what a proper relationship should be like. All the excuses you're making. And he throws you the odd bone, a promise, a bit of sex, bet he tells you he 'loves you' - classic, classic, classic! Ever watched water drain down a plug-hole? That's where all your self-respect, self-confidence and grasp on reality is going. If he wanted to be with you, HE WOULD BE. I wouldn't believe a word this cunt said. And do you really want a man like this as your partner, anyway? Thank god he hasn't moved in. Tell him to FUCK OFF, and once he's there, tell him to FUCK OFF some more - get him OUT OF YOUR LIFE; get your life together, you and the littl'uns, and get on with it - and most importantly, DO NOT attempt to make any future arrangements that rely on him, (re kids), once the OFF-FUCKING has been achieved. He will never stick to any arrangements and you will just find he uses any as a stick to beat/control you with and you'll never be able to get on with anything as you'll be, for instance, waiting for him every other Saturday morning to take kids out and he doesn't turn up - this will also REALLY upset the kids - and they'll remember that - forever - believe me. They may even resent YOU for it - into adulthood. On the bright side, the fact you've posted here is heartening so all is not lost. If you were really sunk into, and your clear reason clogged with, the mire of deceit and self-deceit you wouldn't have. You'd still be trying to convince yourself, in spite of all the plain-as-day evidence, all this was plausible. Also on the bright side, usually with men like this, once they realise the well has dried and you are no longer falling for their bullshit, they almost magically disappear, as it is no longer in their interest or worth the effort to maintain the fiction, and move on to the next poor, gullible cow. Amazing how easily they can shuck it all off; the 'disposable family'. And yet, this will be the saving of you. They are really not worth attempting to maintain ANY kind of relationship with. So please don't kid yourself that the fortnightly visits you may try to keep up are for the good of the children. I would go as far as to say, they are severely detrimental to their welfare and well being, short and long term. The sort of manipulation (and power over you, Amykins) displayed by this man, and so many others like him, does not confine itself to their partners/wives. I do so hope you haven't abandoned this thread. Look up 'primary sociopath' on google.