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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How do you get over fears of accidentally inviting a predatory man into your life?

2 replies

sneezingwakesthebaby · 16/03/2013 18:54

I'm a single mum with a young daughter and while I'm not dating or looking atm, in the distant future I would hopefully like to meet someone else and fall in love.

My problem is I don't see how ill ever get past the fear of accidentally seeing somebody who is going to attempt to take advantage of my daughter. When we were younger, my mum was targeted by a man because she had children and he got caught out quite early on luckily. I feel sick though when I look back and wonder what would have happened if he hadnt made a move when he did and if he had waited until he was more in with our family. He seemed so normal and my mum was shocked by it all.

I know not all men are predators, far from it! But how so i let go of the fear of this happening with my daughter? What if I trust someone and don't realise they are grooming me to get to dd?

Its getting me a bit down as I feel like I will remain alone forever as I can't risk my daughters safety. Be gentle with me please!

OP posts:
ScillyCow · 16/03/2013 18:59

Arm yourself with the facts. Look out for red flags.

There are big warning signs. You will know if you are on the alert for a problem.

Don't tell men about your daughter until you feel comfortable with them.

Flojobunny · 16/03/2013 19:02

Keep DD and dating seperate if you are that worried or be realistic about the likelihood of meeting a monster compared to other risk factors.

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