Advice Needed Please?

[Bavarianlass]

I have a lovely friend who split up with her husband and moved back to Germany in 2009. This is her summarised story (Her words, changed to better English!):

They got married in 1989, have 2 grown up DD and bought a house in 2006. They then separated in 2007. She remained in the house while he lived in barracks.
In 2008 he told her he had met someone else and tried to pressure her for divorce, so she went to a Lawyer for some advice. She told her husband and he jumped the gun and went to a Lawyer himself and filed for divorce.
In 2009, on the advice of her DDs, she moved back to Germany to live with her mother. Her husband bought her car for £5000, which she used to pay for her move and to buy some furniture (she left with absolutely nothing).
She still lives with her mother and has no job. She had been away for 20 years and has no formal qualifications because she spent most of this time being a SAHM, or doing part time jobs as a cleaner.
Her ex husband, meanwhile, has moved his girlfriend into the house they bought together (and the mortgage is still in both their names). He is lying to her about when he will leave the Forces - one minute telling her he is leaving this year, the next telling her he has been signed on for another 7 years. He is refusing to sell the house, even though the children are both grown up and have left home.

She's asked me to help, but I don?t know where to go, or to whom? I did post this in Legal Stuff, but no one answered. I've known her since we both got married, so there's no question that she's not telling the whole truth...

Any advice would be great!

So are they actually divorced? There should have been a financial settlement at the time which included what was to happen to the house and any equity, just as there would have been for any other assets.

What was agreed at the time?

They are divorced, but I don't think there was any agreement or settlement, because she had already gone back to Germany (not the best thing to do, I realise, and I wish I'd known at the time that she was getting nothing). As the house is still in both their names, I assume if and when it gets sold, she'll be entitled to half the equity? As to his service pension, he is telling her nothing! I got in touch with SSAFA for advice, but they were no real help.

Well, I think they are divorced - have just texted her to ask....

The great thing about the Army is that when they misbehave they have to answer to someone. If she knows the base he is on, she must get hold of the Families officer. They will insist that the ex or current DH whatever he is sorts it out.

Don't mess about with the SSAFA, get straight onto the families officer.

You might also be better posting on Forces sweethearts.

There is an issue when you move to another country. My DH's ex was in Germany and he was in the UK. So your friend needs to find out what she is entitled to with a German Lawyer. German law is very fair regarding the payments for children and splitting of income. But i'm not sure they can enforce the payments from the UK, they can merely advise.

Sadly there are a lot of divorces in the UK Forces and quite a few with German women. I think I read somewhere that divorce rates in the UK forces are double that of civilians.