Where and how to get counselling?

[Tailtwister]

DH and I are having a very difficult time with our relationship. There are lots of factors and I have been unhappy for a while. The general pressures of young children, money pressures etc are exacerbating an already existing situation and I'm really feeling that we can't continue to wait for things to fix themselves. DH feels that these external factors are the cause of everything (I'm just tired being his favourite line), but I don't think he feels there's anything fundamental wrong. When I try to discuss things he just sweeps them under the carpet and apart from that, it's very hard to find the right time to discuss things (when the children aren't around or we aren't knackered).

I'm thinking that counselling might help, but I don't really know where to start. Is there a website someone would recommend? Is couples or solo counselling best? What are the financial implications?

Financially things are tight. On paper we look pretty affluent, but with all outgoings taken into account we don't have a huge amount spare to play with.

You can find relationship counselling through things like Relate. However, if money problems are a big part of the friction, have you thought about talking to someone who specialises in personal finance (CAB if you have debts or a financial advisor) and tackling that as a team?

His head in the sand approach may mean he's switched off from the marriage entirely, in which case you have one kind of problem. Or it could simply mean that he thinks the practical/money troubles are too difficult to think about and is hoping they go away. If you can reconnect & communicate as a couple on a project such as budgeting and money management you may find you start to reconnect in other ways.

Thanks Cogito, I'll look into Relate. Our financial situation isn't desperate (debt wise) and we do budget, but there's not a massive surplus IYSWIM.